


On Them Light Has Shined

by HoneySempai



Series: A Cord of Three Strands [11]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Incredible Hulk (2008), Thor (Movies)
Genre: An impressive amount of caroling, Avengers Family, Best Secret Santa Ever, Bucky Barnes Remembers, Bucky Barnes the Favorite Uncle, Christianity, Christmas, Dreidel dreidel dreidel I made it out of whatever was on hand, F/F, F/M, Food Porn, Found Family, Gen, Hanukkah, Holidays, I'm really extra about the caroling sorry not sorry, In which the Civil War is a brief snowball fight, Jewish Laura Barton, Jewish Natasha Romanoff, Jewish Steve Rogers, Jewish Tony Stark, Jewish Wanda Maximoff, Judaism, LITERALLY, Legends, M/M, Multi, Native American Steve Rogers, Norse Heathenry, Novelty Songs, Other, Pointing out plotholes in CACW for fun and profit, Positive Portrayals of Religion, Sam Wilson is a little shit, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Ugly Holiday Sweaters, World War II, Yule, protective dads
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-09
Updated: 2016-12-24
Packaged: 2018-09-01 09:49:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 25,307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8619700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HoneySempai/pseuds/HoneySempai
Summary: December 24th, 2016 The Avengers have a holiday party.





	1. Wolkum Yole

**Author's Note:**

> **TW discussion of alcoholism and death**  
>     
> Because I'm overly attached to my own ideas, I'm borrowing heavily from the [Greatest Generation](http://archiveofourown.org/series/394120) universe (which I swear will be updated once this story is done). So, uh, **warning for ASBL/A:GG spoilers** , I guess. If you're not familiar, my religious headcanons are:
> 
> Steve is Conservative Jewish; Joseph Rogers was raised Presbyterian and converted so he could marry Sarah. Joseph's mother was Oneida Indian and practiced a syncretic traditional/Presbyterian faith, parts of which Steve incorporated into his worldview. Bucky's family went to the same church as Steve's grandmother; they left in protest of how crappily she was treated, and denomination-hopped after that. Peggy was a Christmas-and-Easter Methodist in the 40s, but she became more religious after waking up in the 21st century. After Bucky came back, she started taking him to church with her.
> 
> Tony is Reform Jewish on his father's side and Catholic on his mother's (though Maria's surname "Carbonel" implies that her ancestors could have been Italian Jews who were forcibly converted). He's essentially secular but lowkey attached. Pepper is a practicing Methodist, and introduced Peggy and Bucky to their church.
> 
> In the comics Sam is the son and brother of ministers, but he questioned the faith and studied comparative religion. A google search for "historic black churches in Harlem" tells me that the Wilson family is probably Baptist. A similar search for Philadelphia implies that Rhodey was most likely raised African Methodist Episcopal.
> 
> Clint is the vaguest of vaguely Christian. Laura is Reform/Renewal Jewish and is interested in Buddhism (she seemed like the type). Natasha had a Muslim father and a Jewish mother, and she is in the process of reclaiming her heritage with help from Laura and Fury (also Muslim). Wanda, as in the comics, is Jewish. Cooper, Lila, and Nathaniel are being raised essentially Jewish, but with influences from the other faiths present in their house.
> 
> Asgardian religion is a modified version of Norse Heathenry, based on the limited knowledge we have of it. Bruce practices Buddhist meditation for Hulk-related reasons; he and Laura are buddies in this regard.

Sofia Mariana Potts-Stark is almost two months old, and while every logical bone in Pepper's body reliably informs her that she won't recall any of it, Baby's First Holiday Season needs to be _magical_.

The fact that Christmas Eve and the start of Hanukkah coincide this year seems like a sign. It's also a bit of a pain, logistically, considering that most of their friends have family, but Pepper has enough of her own magic to make it happen. Tony, for his part, hemmed and hawed, quibbled, and temporarily disappeared off the face of the earth, more out of force of habit than genuine reluctance. Pepper went ahead with planning and preparing the meal, and Tony had the topmost ballroom of Avengers Tower completely transformed by the morning of the 24th.

He's still tinkering with the finer details, and Pepper, Sofia strapped to her chest, is hovering around him, pointing out anything that might not be child-friendly. Vision is helping with the positioning of the larger pieces of furniture, and Bruce wisely has elected to take a nap rather than expose himself to any party-related stress that might trigger the Hulk. Pepper, whether through graciousness or the desire to control all proceedings exactly to her liking, has dismissed Steve, Peggy, and Bucky up to the roof to greet the visitors who are flying in. 

Rhodey and Sam, both coming from DC, are the first on the landing pad. Sam tucks his wings back into the pack and quickly sloughs it off as the building sets to work picking apart War Machine, and Rhodey clumsily trips his way out of his half-dismantled armor and sprints forward as soon as he's physically able. 

"Oh no you goddamn don't!" Sam yelps, taking off in kind. Steve stumbles back once it becomes clear that he's their target, and is pushed back a little further when both men slap their hands onto either of his shoulders.

"And that's a win for War Machine," Rhodey announces, his grin smug and triumphant. 

"That was a _tie_ ," Sam throws back. "Steve?" 

"Well, it _felt_ like a tie," Steve offers with a good-natured grumble. 

"Ha!"

"Of course you'd say that; you like him better," Rhodey mutters, straightening himself out. "Miss Carter, Barnes, Merry Christmas."

"Happy Christmas, Rhodey," Peggy responds, with an amused smirk, as Bucky offers a "Merry Christmas" of his own. 

"Captain Rogers," Rhodey addresses Steve stiffly.

"Colonel Rhodes," Steve returns in the same vein; they hold each other's solemn gaze for a few seconds, before Rhodey finally melts into a grin, offering his hand.

"Happy Hanukkah, man." Steve accepts the handshake, murmuring _Merry Christmas_ in return. "Where's Tony?"

"In the ballroom, driving Pepper up a wall, as is his wont," Peggy says. 

"Is Sofia with them?"

"Last we checked."

"She's probably in need of rescuing. See you in a bit?"

They wave him off, grinning at his transparency. Rhodey had been in New York for the birth, and managed to finagle staying long enough to stand at her baptism, but duty had called him back to DC immediately afterwards. Apparently Skype visits were not enough to sate his hunger for time with his goddaughter. 

"Peggy, Merry Christmas," Sam says, once Rhodey has disappeared into the stairwell; she takes the kiss on the cheek he offers and returns the greeting. "Buck, same to you." They have a semi-elaborate handshake that ends with "a one-armed man-hug," as Natasha had put it, that they perform now. "And Happy Hanukkah to Captain Special Snowflake with his fancy Jewish holiday."

Steve pushes Sam's head, earning himself a laugh and a hug, two-armed this time. The sound of blades chopping the air from a distance takes them out of the embrace, and all four back away to make room for a small helicopter to bank in from the west and settle on the rooftop. It's another minute or so after the blades stop moving for the passengers to get themselves together and pull open the door, but no time at all after that for Cooper and Lila to hit the roof running. 

Bucky is the target this time. Since 2014, when Steve and Peggy thought it would be good for Bucky to accompany them to the farm for Halloween, he had been chosen as the favorite adult. Still reticent to join in conversations with the other Avengers, Bucky had found himself following Cooper and Lila up to strangers' doors while their parents and his partners kept their own counsel on the sidewalk. He helped them sort their candy afterwards, herded them away from the bonfire when they got too close, and at one point attempted to relate a ghost story from his childhood to them (Steve had to intervene to help him with details, but Cooper and Lila still saw Bucky as the primary storyteller). The following Halloween Bucky had been healthier, happier, slightly more giddy since he and Peggy had conspired to dress up as Ironettes as part of a larger prank against Steve, and excitedly greeted by the kids, who wanted his attention again. This year Cooper and Lila had spent both the summer and then Halloween in the city, and Peggy had teased Bucky that they might be tired of him by the time "Chrismanukkah" rolled around. 

Not so, apparently. Bucky catches them, lifting a shrieking Lila into the air with his metal arm and tossing her over his shoulder. At the helicopter Natasha, a baby bag slung over her shoulder, has hopped out of one of the passenger seats and is assisting Laura, holding Nathaniel, out; Clint has vanished from the pilot's seat into the belly of the chopper, along with Wanda. By the time Natasha, Laura, and Nathaniel make it to the group awaiting them, Lila has been rearranged to be seated on Bucky's shoulders, while Cooper leans heavily against his side, clinging to his metal arm.

"Nice shirt," Steve says, eyeing Natasha's torso, on which she sports a dark blue sweatshirt decorated with stylized snowflakes throughout, a menorah across the stomach, and **THIS PARTY IS LIT** emblazoned in silver across the chest. 

"It gets better," Natasha says with a smirk. There's a small black button in the center of one of the snowflakes, and when she presses it, the center and rightmost candles of the menorah light up.

"Oh my God," Steve laughs, as the others cackle. Natasha presses the button a few more times, demonstrating that each candle can be lit up in the proper succession, before she resets her shirt to null. "Leave it to you, Nat." Natasha raises an eyebrow, and takes Nathaniel from Laura's arms to show that her common-law wife is wearing the same shirt. 

"Aw Laura, no, she got you too?" Bucky says, flexing his metal arm and lifting Cooper, who has been hanging onto it, off his feet.

"It was Clint's idea," Laura reports, over her son's laughter. "He said that it wasn't fair that Christmas had the monopoly on ugly sweaters, so he made sure me and Nat had our own."

"What a guy," Steve deadpans, in time for Clint to start approaching them, several wrapped boxes stacked high in his arms. Wanda trails after him, levitating a handful more above her head.

"Yeah, so, you guys don't have to _help_ or anything," Clint calls over the stack of boxes in his arms.

"Cool, thanks," Natasha replies, as Laura laughs.

"Shoulda sent them ahead of time, man," Sam chides, as his own presents were.

" _I'll_ help you, Clint," Peggy says, stepping forward to relieve him of a few of the boxes. Steve follows, taking a few more, and the packages end up distributed amongst everyone besides Natasha and Bucky, whose arms are still full of children.

"All right, lemme see that Ugly Christmas Sweater," Sam demands, stepping back once he has his burden.

Clint is happy to oblige, lifting the one package he now has left out of the way. His sweater is bright red, sporting a tacky but otherwise nondescript Christmas tree, complete with presents lying around the base, and a cat sticking its head out from within the branches.

"Aw, man, I was expecting something m--" Clint presses one of the ornaments, and the whole tree lights up. "And there we go."

"Wanda?" Steve prompts. She smiles apologetically and shakes her head, opening up her coat to reveal a tasteful dark blue dress. "Well, you look very nice, in any case."

"We should probably get these downstairs asap," Laura says, showing off her stack of gifts. "Who all are we waiting for now?"

"Just Thor--" Peggy starts.

A shadow passes over the gathering, and they look up to see a dark cloud forming over the city, the Tower in particular. Bucky takes a cue from Natasha shielding Nathaniel's head and pulls Lila off his shoulders; she tucks into his side opposite her brother as a lightning bolt splits the air. The resulting thunderclap is loud enough to make everyone wince--Bucky grips the kids' hands as tightly as they grip his--and by the time they straighten themselves out, Thor is standing on the roof between them and the helicopter, a sack slung over his right shoulder, and a barrel tucked under his left arm.

"God Jol, my friends!"

"...and to you too," Steve says, a tad flabbergasted, as Thor strides towards them. "Good timing."

"Heimdall saw that you all had gathered and so I thought it the right time to make my entrance," Thor says, near enough to count as having joined the group.

"Are those presents?" Cooper asks, peeking out from behind Bucky's leg and pointing at the sack.

"Indeed they are," Thor booms, a grin spreading across his face.

"And lemme guess, that's mead," Natasha says, nodding at the barrel.

"Ah, it is in fact not," Thor says, hefting up what is proving to be unwieldy even for him. "This is risgrynsgrot."

"You seen a doctor about that?" Sam mutters.

"He means "what is it?"," Peggy interprets, seeing a look of confusion flit across Thor's face.

"Ah. Well, I believe you English-speakers refer to it as "[rice pudding](http://www.swedishfood.com/swedish-food-recipes-desserts/389-rice-pudding)"." He grins broadly to show he means no serious condescension. "It is a breakfast food this time of year in Asgard, though sweet enough to be a dessert. I thought to contribute it to the feast."

"So no booze?" Clint asks, with mock disappointment.

Thor shakes his head. "I thought it best to not bring any, what with..."

It takes the grown-ups a moment to realize that he's concerned for Sofia, and they share a knowing look. Steve is about to mention that he hasn't seen Tony take a drink since November 5th, but is usurped by Lila complaining that it's become too cold for comfort.

"It's almost time to start, anyway," Laura says, glancing down at the watch on her wrist. "We really need to get this stuff set up downstairs."

Wanda brings her levitating packages down a bit so they fit inside the stairwell, and trails after the group as they take their leave of the roof. Steve glances back at her with a worried look when he realizes the small distance she's put between herself and the others, and she attempts to smile at him. This is the first holiday since Pietro's death that she's attempting to enjoy, although by her sustained quiet she knows he can't tell.

Bucky catches the look Steve is giving her and glances back. She flashes them a small, quick smile; Bucky winks at her, and she stretches her smile out to look warmer and more sincere. By her own estimation, her time as a Hydra abductee is not comparable to his, but he and Steve, and probably Peggy, though she's never said as much, seem to think of them as kindred spirits. She's not inclined to disabuse them of the notion.

After exiting the stairwell the group crowds into the elevator, though uncomfortably. Luckily it doesn't take too long to get to the floor of the ballroom, and they peel themselves away from each other and the walls with good humor. Lila and Cooper rush ahead through the vestibule and into the ballroom proper, and their happy gasps herald the entrance of the rest of the party.

The room, awash in the warm yellow-white light that spreads from the chandelier to dance along the ceiling, is split up into loosely-defined sections. The farthest section of the room is set up to reflect the winter in California that Tony had grumbled about sorely missing since the mansion was destroyed, replete with palm trees and beach chairs facing a holographic view of the ocean projected onto the walls. As the scene encroaches further into the room it fades into an East Coast winter scene, pine trees replacing the palms and the floor covered with what Bruce had referred to as "Faux" when the concept came up: a synthetic, room-temperature "snow" that could be packed for throwing and building purposes. The center of the room, the actual dance floor, is partially taken up by a banquet table, already set with china and crystalware. The West Coast has been set up on the side with the bar, and Steve glances to his right to see the hologram of a fire, with heat coming of it, set next to a large, freestanding antique radio--

"[SLEIGH BELLS RIIIIIIIIIIIING ARE YOU LIST'NING?](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5VOkWE0I8c0)" suddenly blasts into Steve's ear, making him wince away and into Peggy, who only narrowly avoids taking everyone else down in a domino effect. Immediately their glares seek out Tony, who grins at them from behind the radio and then looks up.

"Bring it down some, Girl Friday." The volume is dutifully lowered. "Happy Merry, Avengers and family."

"What? I can't hear you," Steve grumbles, sticking his finger in his ear and wiggling it.

"Uh-oh. Clint, where d'you get your hearing aids from? Looks like we gotta get a pair for Grandpa over here..."

Steve crouches down, collects a handful of "Faux", and chucks it at Tony's head. He ducks that one, but fails to avoid the second one thrown by Sam.

"There will be blood and it will be yours, Tweety," Tony says, pointing at Sam, gaze intense and unblinking. "If you [t'ink you tee old Tanty Cwause](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QRJXstBFqOY) tonight, t'ink again."

"Duly noted," Sam says, barely suppressing a grin. Behind Tony, Lila and Cooper have already started their own fauxball fight in earnest.

"Tony, this is amazing," Laura says, both diplomatic and sincere as she takes in the room.

"You are both kind and correct, Mrs. Romanoff," Tony says, though he can't hide how genuinely pleased he is with the praise. "As you can see," he says, turning and gesturing to the room with a sweeping gesture, "I have accounted for the civilized people who enjoy the blessings of the [Heat Miser](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=_SGlPnA_iCk), as well as the accursed peons who don't realize that they suffer under the oppressive yoke of the Snow Miser. I know, I'm too much. If you brought food it goes in the kitchen," he directs at Thor, and points to a set of swinging double doors on the center of the left side of the room. "Pep's in there with Not-JARVIS putting the last-minute food stuff together."

"No servants to attend to the celebration?" Thor asks, even as he starts towards the kitchen, having set the sack of gifts down to the side of him.

"Despite what you may have read in the papers I am not _actually_ the bastard product of drunken hatesex between the Grinch and Ebeneezer Scrooge."

"If you're gonna put images like that in my head then you better've got me brain bleach for Christmas," Sam mutters.

"Whole staff's got the weekend off," Tony continues blithely. " _We_ will be waiting on ourselves."

"And where do you want us to put these?" Clint asks, lifting his one remaining wrapped present.

"Under the tree, where else do presents go?"

"Any tree?" Laura asks.

"...yeah, you know what? Scatter them. We'll make ourselves work for it. We got Hanukkah, we got Christmas, we got Yule. Might as well throw Easter in the mix."

"No Kwanzaa though," Sam says, shaking his head. "Racist."

"Uh, Tony?" Bucky pipes up, as the others begin to drift towards the cluster of trees where several presents are already stacked, Wanda adding Thor's sack of gifts to her set of levitating packages. "Where's the baby?"

"Sold her. She's halfway to Japan right now." Tony makes a face. "Rhodey's got her. Pepper handed her to him instead of me, _rude_ , and then work called him, _ruder_ , and he stepped upstairs to tell them not to bother him on the holidays."

"Wow, Tony," Laura calls over, setting down one of her boxes and seeing the base of each tree is set in a large container of dirt. "These are real trees?"

"I was expecting artificial ones outta you," Clint says with a smirk. "[Great, big, shiny aluminum Christmas trees](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J0q-u2WffjM), in fact."

"What's up with the underestimation of my character today?" Tony asks, throwing up his hands. "Have I ever failed to deliver before? Don't answer that. Santa Cap said he wanted genuine [white pine trees](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pinus_strobus), so that's what I supplied. I'm nice like that."

"White pine trees in particular?" Natasha repeats, turning a curious look to Steve.

"Ahh...yeah..." Steve starts, taking the time to crouch by his unloaded burden and think of how to phrase his answer. "You know the Iroquois League?"

"I'm familiar with their work."

Steve makes a face at her as he straightens up. "The Iroquois Confederacy is made up of six nations," Steve says, and raises his hand to tick them off on his fingers. "The Cayuga, the Mohawk, the Seneca, the Onondaga, the Tuscarora, and finally, _my_ people, my grandmother's people, the Oneida. [The story goes](http://www.uwosh.edu/coehs/cmagproject/ethnomath/legend/legend15.htm) that a long time ago, the six nations were all at war with each other. But everyone was tired of the fighting..."

"Tired of fighting? You sure these are _your_ people?" Tony cuts in.

"... _so they all got together_ and agreed to bury their weapons underneath a white pine tree."

"So they'd be carried away by the underground waters," Bucky pipes up suddenly. 

There's a beat of silence. Steve turns a little slowly, his eyes widening slightly. "You remember that, Buck? You remember the story?"

"A little," Bucky says hesitantly. It's been a long time since he recalled anything new, and longer since it was minutiae like this, and he fights to keep his imagination from adding any embellishments. "I don't remember... _when_ , exactly. But I remember her telling it, Aksot telling it to Becky, but you and I were there, too. She said the weapons...the weapons were all carried away to the four directions. And after that the nations didn't fight with each other anymore; they became the Haudenosaunee, the League, instead. And so the white pine came to be known as the Tree of Peace." He pauses, searching his memory for any more details, and then grimaces apologetically. "That's...that's all I remember."

"That's...that's it, that's the whole story," Steve says, a little dazedly. "God, Bucky, that's...she told you guys that story when we were _twelve_. I can't believe you remembered it; that's incredible."

"It's a non-denominational winter seasonal celebration miracle," Natasha says, but her sarcasm is tempered by the sheer joy taking over Steve's expression. Bucky flushes a little, moreso when Peggy wraps her arms around Bucky's shoulders and plants a proud kiss on his cheek.

"That's such a nice story to be able to remember, too," Laura says approvingly.

Steve nods emphatically and turns his grinning face to her. "We definitely couldn't fit an actual tree in the apartment, so when I was _real_ little, before her arthritis got bad, my grandmother would take me out to find a white pine around Christmastime, and we would, you know, decorate it a little bit, if we had old ribbons or string lying around, or if I got around to making paper decorations that year. She thought it was appropriate for Christmas. Tree of Peace, peace on earth..." Laura nods. "So when Tony said he was getting trees for the party, I..." He gestures around. "Well, I made a request."

"Always happy to oblige my friends and neighbors," Tony says, and gets hit in the back of the head with another fauxball. "All right, somebody's gonna die."

Cooper and Lila sprint further into the room in a whirlwind of shrieks and giggles. Steve uses the moment of distraction to take Bucky's hand and press a quick kiss to the back of it, and then maneuver his way to giving another one to Peggy's temple.

A fauxball explodes against the side of his face, and he whips around to see Wanda grinning impishly at him. She flees when he crouches to scoop up his own handful of faux, and he takes off in hot pursuit. Once within reach he tackles her, bringing them both down to their knees, and rubs his fauxball into the side of her face while she cackles defiantly at him and struggles her way free.

Laura takes Nathaniel and his bag from Natasha and excuses herself from the fight to entertain him with [Where is Baby's Dreidel?](https://www.amazon.com/Where-Babys-Dreidel-Lift-Flap/dp/1416936238<<i) at the banquet table, which becomes a safe zone by unspoken agreement. At first it seems as though the group has split up into teams based on marital ties or the lack thereof, until Bucky stuffs a fauxball down the back of Peggy's shirt, Natasha smashes one on top of Clint's head, and it devolves into a free-for-all from there. Thor comes back from the kitchen about to announce that dinner is almost ready, and is quickly distracted; Rhodey enters with Sofia just in time to see Thor gather a bowling ball-sized fauxball and pitch it across the room at Wanda. She dodges, and the tree behind her vibrates dangerously as it takes the hit instead.

"Jesus, be careful, people!" Rhodey yelps. "Man with a baby coming through."

Tony gets one last hit directly to Sam's face before scuttling across the floor; Sam refrains from retaliating when he sees where Tony is headed but internally swears to take revenge at later date. Clint and Natasha turn in towards the center of the room, rushing the kids towards the West Coast to distract them from continuing the fight as the rest of the adults calm themselves down.

"Thank you for the prompt return of my progeny, Rhodey," Tony says, plucking Sofia matter-of-factly out of Rhodey's arms. "Do me a favor and go get Jolly Old Saint Green Giant? Dinner should be ready soon."

"It will be," Thor announces from some feet away, as Rhodey gives Tony a mock salute and turns around, disappearing back towards the elevator. "I...may have forgotten to let you all know." 

"Well in that case," Tony says, transferring Sofia to one arm so he can snap his fingers at the ceiling. "Cue dinner music."

The sound of strings and drums accompanied by a flute fills up the ballroom as Tony uses his free hand to gesture for the others to follow him into the kitchen, and he's already belting out, loudly and deliberately under pitch, ["The Boar's Head in hand bear I / Bedecked with bays and rosemary](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uFYpRS-4Y2A)..." when he shoves the door open.

"And I pray you, my masters, be merry," Vision offers helpfully from where he's holding a casserole dish, perfectly in key, "Quot estis in convivio."

"Caput apri defero / Reddens laudes Domino!" Peggy joins in, a broad smile born of recognizing an otherwise forgotten tune spreading across her face. "Caput apri defero / Reddens laudes Domino!"

"What _is_ this song?" Clint asks over the brief interlude between chorus and verse, but if anyone tells him the answer it's lost under the music.

"The Boar's Head, I understand / Is the rarest dish in all the land..." Peggy and Vision continue; Tony has dropped out, and Pepper replaces him under her breath as she walks past, holding a huge platter carrying the titular boar's head. "And thus bedecked with a gay garland / Let us servire cantico." Peggy picks up a serving bowl and plops it into Steve's hands. "Caput apri defero / Reddens laudes Domino / Caput apri defero / Reddens laudes Domino!"

A collective decision to let the few who know this carol have their fun goes unspoken amongst the ones who don't, and the others begin picking up platters and dishes to bring out to the table.

"Our steward hath provided this / In honor of the King of Bliss / Which on this day to be served is / In Reginensi atrio." Peggy pauses abruptly where she is, a stinging sensation at the corner of her eyes taking her by surprise, and she has to cough out a growing lump in her throat. She turns around before she can school her expression into something more cheery to find Steve and Bucky standing behind her, clutching their own serving dishes, and they notice it before she can hide her face.

"You okay, Pegs?" Steve asks, as the recording launches into the chorus overhead.

"I'm all right," she says, waving her hand. "I was just..." Steve and Bucky both set their dishes down in a coordinated _I'm worried about you_ strike. Peggy sighs, and gives up on pretending that it's silly. " _In Reginensi atrio_ ," she sings, "means in Queen's College, Oxford. That's where Michael went to school. That's how I know this song, it's something of an anthem there. I'd forgotten until just now...he would always jump up and shout out that line. One time he wasn't careful, and when he jumped up he smacked his wine glass right over into Mother's lap. I thought it was the funniest thing..."

She gives a faint laugh before her expression grows distant, and Steve chews the inside of his cheek, lips curling into a sympathetic grimace. Peggy had lost her brother twice; first suffering under the mistaken impression that he'd been killed in action, and then again after waking up in the 21st century to discover that he had survived, married, raised a family, suffered the loss of all but his baby granddaughter in a plane crash, raised that granddaughter to become a SHIELD Special Agent, and had become so riddled with dementia in his old age that most of the time, before his death in May, he couldn't recognize Sharon, let alone Peggy.

"You didn't talk to Sharon today yet, right?" Bucky asks.

"No, I'm going to call her in the morning," Peggy says, and manages a smile. "She and Cameron, apparently, are having their own little holiday party this evening. I'd hate to interrupt."

"Okay." They regard each other quietly for a moment, before Peggy steps closer to them and reaches up to wrap her arms around Steve's neck. He returns the gesture around the small of her back, and Bucky curls around to hug her from behind, reaching forward to squeeze Steve into the embrace.

"Hey, hey, what are you three doing? Canoodling is not on the itinerary," Tony says from behind Steve, and Peggy squeezes Steve's arm as she lets him go, stopping him from snapping at Tony. "Save it for after dinner. My better half has outdone herself this year and I am in charge of making sure her work is properly appreciated."

"Oh, does that mean I get at least thirteen percent of the credit this time?" Pepper mutters as she crosses their path, Vision trailing behind her like a slightly more useful baby duck.

"It's Chrismanukkah, Pep. You get fourteen. Well, thirteen and a half. Can't look whipped."

Pepper rolls her eyes, before turning her gaze to Steve and holding up the platter she's carrying for his regard. " _This_ is what we have for you, Wanda, and Natasha. [Baccala mantecato](http://forward.com/food/165695/twist-on-classic-salt-cod-mousse/)."

"I hope this wasn't too much of a bother," Steve says once he has it, glancing down at the stockfish, reduced to a mousse-like state in its prepared form and surrounded by small pieces of toast, that he had somewhat bashfully requested. He normally handles his own dietary concerns; on the occasions that his family eats with Tony and Pepper, the staff is trained to accommodate him.

"Not at all. Tony was happy you asked for fish, actually."

"[Fish on Christmas Eve is apparently an Italian thing](https://www.walksofitaly.com/blog/how-to/christmas-food-traditions-in-italy)," Tony says, with the particular brand of nonchalance that it's easy to tell is feigned. "I dunno. My mom used to insist on it."

They don't move, but there's unmistakably a ripple of nerves that passes through Steve, Peggy, and Bucky. The topic of Howard and Maria has not been broached between them since the day after #shieldishydra trended, when Tony woke up to see **WINTER SOLDIER KILLED IRON MAN'S PARENTS** headlining every major news source, flew to DC, and had to be restrained by Peggy, Natasha, Sam, and most of the security staff to keep him from murdering Bucky at the hospital. Even after it was announced that President Ellis was preemptively pardoning Bucky due to overwhelming evidence of coercion, and the press swarmed the mansion, Tony had refused all interviews. When he called Steve and Peggy to offer the use of the Tower as a haven he mentioned that he, like the rest of the world at that point, had read Bucky's files, but he made no further comment, and they hadn't pressed for any. The closest they had come to discussing it recently was when Tony revealed Sofia's full name, but Tony had plowed through the announcement, and the subject died before it truly lived.

"Glad to've had the recipe on hand for people who actually _think_ about what they shove in their gaping maws," Tony continues, as if he doesn't notice their reaction. "Speaking of." Laura is passing by; he transfers Sofia to one arm and catches Laura by the elbow. "Got fake-turkey for you and your seedlings, Earth Mother. You'll have to share with Elphaba and Frosty the Tinman, fair warning."

"Oh, you stopped eating meat?" Laura asks brightly, turning to Bucky.

"Um...yeah," Bucky says, with a tight shrug. "Saw a thing...saw a _couple_ things...on factory farming, and..."

"It's awful, isn't it?" she says helpfully, before he figures out if he can make himself verbally compare industrial animal agriculture to what he remembers from the early days as Hydra's captive. He nods mutely instead, and thankfully everyone's attention is diverted by the entrance of Rhodey and Bruce into the ballroom.

"Ah, my besties!" Tony greets them. "Here, make yourselves useful."

Even with two more people it takes everyone a handful of trips to move all the food from the kitchen to the table, especially when some has to be rushed back to be rewarmed. Eventually, though, the table fair to groans under the weight of the repast: in addition to the boar's head, imitation turkey cutlets, and baccala, a full roast turkey has joined the list of entrees, complemented by at least two bowls each of a sweet potato/turnip mash flavored with sage, collard greens cooked with ham, red beans and rice, butternut squash tossed with cinnamon and nutmeg, corn, string beans, and baked macaroni and cheese. Plates of cornbread and latkes, both potato and cheese, accompanied by little dishes of applesauce and sour cream, round out the dinner. Bruce jokes that by the time they set out the drinks--bottles of Manischewitz and sparkling apple cider, a pitcher of wassail, eggnog, and a boiling hot kettle of tea--the table is liable to collapse.

"Then we'll eat off the floor," Pepper says vehemently.

The table, luckily, maintains its structural integrity, and is fully set by the time the sun is out of the sky. Pepper takes Sofia from Tony, allowing him to wander into the kitchen and come back with a matchbook as she directs everyone towards one of the many windows, where a surprisingly small and plain [menorah](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Menorah_\(Hanukkah\)) sits on the sill ("Not that many people will see it from here, but Tony insisted.") It reminds Steve of the one his mother had kept, and his gut twists a bit to realize that this particular menorah had probably seen Howard grow up as well as Tony.

"All right, how are we doing this?" Tony asks, brandishing the matchbook at his guests. "I'm afraid my Hebrew is beyond rusty at this point. More like decayed. Rotted. I would recite [Kaddish](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kaddish) for it, except, well. Cap?" Tony rounds on Steve, breaking into his thoughts. "You up for it?"

"Actually," Natasha pipes up before Steve has to answer, raising her hand. "We have something planned, if no one objects."

Steve gestures his acceptance of the situation, and Tony tosses the matchbook to Natasha. "Knock yourself out."

Natasha flips the lid open as he herds her to the forefront of the group, and everyone else into gathering around her. She pauses, studying the two rows of matches with an unreadable expression; after a moment Laura puts her free hand, the other arm busy supporting Nathaniel, on Natasha's shoulder and squeezes, and Natasha looks over to see a proud, encouraging smile on her face.

"You got this, Nat," Clint murmurs, from the other side.

Natasha squares her shoulders, tears a stick out of the matchbook, and lights it against the sandpaper strip on the back. Laura reaches around her, picking up the shamash for her; she takes it with her free hand, sets the wick alight, and shakes the match flame out of existence, setting the stick onto the sill beside the menorah. Clint digs a pitch pipe out of his pocket and blows the starting note she had asked him to use; she opens her mouth, goes still for a second or two, and then sings.

"[Baruch atah Adonai Eloheinu Melech ha'olam asher kid'shanu b'mitzvotav v'tsivanu l'hadlik ner shel Hanukkah.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9WMGWJaZkb4)" Her voice is a pleasant mezzo; not precisely confident but strong nonetheless; her timbre is earthy, the vibrato not overdone. Laura squeezes her shoulder encouragingly again as a handful of "amen"s respond.

Natasha moves slightly to the side, allowing Wanda to move up beside her, and hands the shamash to the younger woman. Wanda's breath catches as she regards the candle, and she looks up, allowing herself a second to collect her bearings.

From her vantage point she can easily see Steve from the corner of her eye. He notices her hesitation, and brings his hands up to shoulder height, so she can see the double thumbs-up he's giving her. Peggy winks at her beside Steve, and Bucky on the other side sends her a goofy face, which makes her smile; accompanied by a comforting little nudge from Laura, and another helpful blow of the pitch pipe from Clint, she's bolstered enough to start the second blessing.

"[Baruch atah Adonai Eloheinu Melech ha'olam she'asah nisim la'avoteinu v'imoteinu bayamim hahaeim baz'man hazeh](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ON2UQ6fhmI)."

Her voice is higher and shakier, though no less dulcet, than Natasha's. She takes a breath as the others says "Amen", glancing at Natasha, and then over at Laura and down to Lila. "[Baruch atah...](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ToWIpBhgJcc)"

"...Adonai," the other women chorus, Lila joining Natasha on the melody as Wanda and Laura split off into a higher harmony, "Eloheinu Melech ha'olam shehecheyanu v'kiy'manu v'higianu laz'man hazeh."

There's a breath of silence, and then a soft sound of delighted approval that ripples throughout the group, along with scattered applause and "amen"s. Wanda allows herself a small, pleased smile as she lights the only other candle and places the shamash back in the center holder.

"Ready?" Clint asks once she's done, and he blows a starting note when he gets an affirmative response.

"[Rock of ages, let our song / Praise Thy saving power](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=l1cm1qYsN2I)." Cooper and Clint join in this time, in unison with the women of their family. "Thou amidst the raging foes / Wast our sheltering tower." Steve slips his voice into the group quietly. "Furious they assailed us / But Thine arm availed us / And Thy word / Broke their sword / When our own strength failed us."

"And Thy word / Broke their sword / When our own strength failed us," Cooper and Lila chorus on their own, obviously proud to have their own duet.

"Unnecessary key change!" Clint announces, and blows another note on the pitch pipe; the opening words are somewhat lost when half the singers, and listeners, start to laugh.

"Children of the martyr race," they continue, some still in the original key, others in a key all their own, "Whether free or fettered / Wake the echoes of the songs / Where you may be scattered." Steve catches a glimpse of movement, and glances over to his periphery to see Tony mouthing the words silently. "Yours the message cheering / That the time is nearing / Which will see / All men free / Tyrants disappearing."

"Which will see / All men free / Tyrants disappearing," Cooper and Lila respond, now with Wanda, and Steve, under his breath, joining them.

The whole gathering cheers and claps as the fermata peters out, and a few hugs and kisses are distributed to the kids and to Natasha and Wanda. They drift apart enough to move comfortably, but travel as a group back to the table. Pepper settles Sofia into the bassinet besides her and takes the seat at the head of the table, Tony to her right; she surveys the table as everyone is seated, a smile lighting up her face.

"Thank you, everyone, for joining us tonight," she says. "Tony and I are so happy that we get to share Sofia's first "Chrismanukkah"," she uses air quotes for the word, which earns her some laughs, "with all of you. Some of you have been with us since the beginning," Rhodey gives a broad grin, "and some of you are newcomers to our lives," she glances down the table at Vision, and then at Wanda, who both look bashful at the attention, "but we are proud to call all of you our friends and, dare I say it, our family. Again, thank you, so much, and from the bottom of our hearts we wish you the happiest of holidays."

A murmur of warm agreement ripples through the table as Pepper sits, and once it quiets Thor stands, having poured himself a glass of wassail and now raising it.

"My friends! A toast." There's a bit of a mad scramble as drinks are passed around the table. Clint and Natasha pour glasses of sparkling cider for Cooper and Lila respectively, and Natasha passes the bottle uptable for Pepper; from across the table and three seats down Steve catches Tony pick up a wine bottle, consider it for a second, and then set it down and pour himself a glass of sparkling cider, as well.

"[It is customary](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yule#Attestations) at this time of year in Asgard to make four toasts before a feast," Thor explains. "Some of the traditional ones are not quite apt for this occasion, so I shall modify them for our purposes." He raises his glass high in front of him, prompting the rest of the party to do the same. "First, a drink of health to us, to our victory over the foes who would threaten the Nine Realms. To the Avengers!"

"To the Avengers!" the group responds, lifting their glasses a little higher and bringing them back down to the original height.

"Second, a drink of blessing on the food laid before us, and on the peace we are afforded to enjoy it this night. To the feast!"

"To the feast!"

"Third, a drink of gratitude to the queen of this celebration, our venerable hostess." He gestures to Pepper, who blushes brightly. "To Pepper Potts."

"To Pepper Potts!" The refrain is louder this time, making her blush harder; Tony pokes her in the cheek and she bats his hand away.

"And fourth," Thor says, his tone drifting down into solemnity as his hands wilts correspondingly, "a drink in memory of those we love, who have departed this life for the next. To our dead."

"To our dead," goes the response, somber but no less sincere, and the air fills with the soft clinking sounds of glasses being tapped together, and then of people sipping and swallowing. Peggy finds Bucky's flesh hand underneath the table just as Steve feels a metal finger hook around three of his.

"And one last thing, before we can eat," Tony says. "You will notice, like the astute observers you all are, that you have [Christmas crackers](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christmas_cracker) on your plates. Well, _holiday_ crackers, excuse me." Indeed the crackers are in red and green, blue and silver, or gold and white, depending on the sittee. "Peggy, as our resident Brit, is going to school us in the correct use of them."

"Won't that be a bit loud, Tony?" Peggy asks. "For the babies?"

"Nope. Trust me on this one," he says when he sees her about to protest. "I made sure of it."

"All right then," Peggy says slowly, dubiously. "Well, first, everyone move your drinks to the middle of the table for their protection." The group follows her instruction. "Now everybody hold your cracker on the end bit with your right hand," they do, "and cross your left hand over and grab onto your neighbor's." There is some fumbling as the logistics of this is lost on a few people, but after some sarcastic commentary and helpful, if mildly frustrated, manhandling, a front basket hold is achieved. "All right, on the count of three, everyone pull. _Carefully_. One...two...three!"

Thankfully the noise of sixteen crackers popping open at the same time is much softer than Peggy feared, and the loudest thing in the room is the sound of Cooper and Lila squealing as several small pieces of [gelt](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hanukkah_gelt) fall out of their crackers and onto their plates.

"Made these special," Tony says proudly.

"I can tell," Steve says dryly, picking up the star-spangled paper crown that fell out of his own cracker. Bucky deftly plucks it from Steve's hand and drops it on his head, earning himself a death glare; Peggy reaches over Bucky to adjust it as the rest of the table compares and exclaims over their treasures.

"And _now_ we can eat," Tony says. "Mangia."

"If the boar's head could be passed to me I will gladly carve it," Thor says, having set his own, green paper crown on his head. "I've done so at many a Yuletide feast."

"Oh, Thor, we're not keeping you from an important function, are we?" Pepper asks, her eyes crinkling worriedly.

"Not to worry," Thor says, as the platter holding the boar's head is passed from hand to hand towards him. "The festival lasts for three weeks; I can be spared for a day or two."

"So what exactly _are_ you all celebrating in Asgard right now?" Rhodey asks. 

Thor looks thoughtful for a moment, considering the best way to explain. "[Time in Asgard is split between Alfradoll, whom you would call our sun, and her rival Nokkve, the darkness](http://freya.theladyofthelabyrinth.com/?page_id=397). Alfrodoll's light sustains all nature, Asgardian and animal and vegetation alike. She is also the source of all the souls in Asgard; it is she who sends us forth to fulfill our five-thousand year destinies. Without her, Asgard would be as Jotunheim: a barren wasteland of dark, cold days and darker, colder hearts." He pauses for breath and thought. "Three days ago, Alfradoll was killed and eaten by the Wolf of Nokkve."

"Yikes," Sam offers under his breath.

"An apt observation, Son of Wil," Thor says, with just enough joviality to make Sam wonder if he's being made fun of. "The Wolf, like his mistress, is a creature from Hel. It thinks of nothing but sating it's hunger by devouring Alfradoll, even if it means the destruction of Asgard. Alfradoll can delay him for a time, but eventually she is overcome with exhaustion. Her light dims, and Nokkve's power grows; the days in Asgard grow darker and colder until finally, Alfradoll succumbs. It is fortunate, then, that as the Wolf approaches and darkness settles upon Asgard, Alfrodoll gives birth to a daughter. The three weeks following the death of the old sun are dedicated to the giving of power and glory to the new, so that she may grow in strength, and thus bring warmth and light and growth to Asgard for another year."

"Whoa," Lila breathes from across the table, her eyes having gone progressively wider as the story continued. Thor tips his glass in her direction, and then rises so as to better carve the boar's head.

"That's cooler than _our_ holidays."

"Tony it's not a competition," Bruce mutters in one breath.

"I like your holidays," Thor says, grinning at the favorable comparison nonetheless. Heimdall had witnessed Midgardian celebrations for millennia, and related them to Thor when he received the invitation to this party. "They're not so different from ours, I think. Your birth of the infant Christ is along the same vein as the birth of our Alfradoll. And Asgard celebrates several annual victory commemorations."

"Really, what better reason to throw a party than "this one time, [we totally kicked the Syrians'](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hanukkah) a-aaaahhhh butt"," Tony says, and there are a few snickers around the table. "Curses. My stellar wit has been foiled by the presence of minors."

"It's okay, you can say "ass" in front of us," Cooper says. 

"Cooper Benjamin!" Laura squawks, and the gathering dissolves into amused commentary as he gets a variety of scoldings from all three of his parents. 

Dinner starts in earnest then, individual conversations starting up between groups of two or three as food is passed around and portioned out. Sofia demands to join the dinner a few minutes in, resulting in Pepper relating a story of how Tony had once tried to make fun of Steve and Bucky's perceived prudishness when it comes to breastfeeding, only to be met with [confused looks](https://breastfeedingusa.org/content/article/nursing-public-what-us-mothers-faced-colonial-times-until) and Bucky asking "Do...ladies...not feed their kids anymore?" Bubbles, a vial of soapy solution and a wand having been in Natasha's cracker, float intermittently through the air, much to everyone's delight, as do small pieces of food that Nathaniel throws from his high chair when Laura is too distracted to catch him, much to everyone's indulgent good humor. 

Cooper and Lila, naturally, inhale their food within fifteen minutes and beg to be excused from the table. Once permission is granted, Cooper scoops up the gelt from their crackers and hightails it to the backpack he had sloughed off in a corner of the dance floor, while Lila goes around the table to tap on Bucky's arm and ask him to join them at [dreidel](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dreidel).

"Oh sure, don't ask your _actual_ Jewish uncle-type-person to play," Clint teases; Natasha blows a stream of bubbles in Lila's direction. 

"It's okay, I'm not offended," Steve laughs, ruffling Lila's hair when he sees her crestfallen face. 

"Lemme finish eating first, kiddo," Bucky says, wrapping an arm around Lila's shoulder and squeezing her to his side. "And then I'll play with you guys. Okay?"

"Okay," Lila concedes.

"Actually," Vision pipes up from his end of the table. "If it would be acceptable, I..." he gestures to his clean plate. "Since I'm incapable of eating, I could play with Cooper and Lila, if they would like me to."

"Sure!" Lila says amiably; Cooper throws a "'Kay" over from where he's setting up. 

"I will go to supervise," Wanda says with an amused smirk, rising from her seat at roughly the same time as Vision.

"Did you eat enough?" Clint asks, eyeing her plate.

" _Ye~s_ ," Wanda drawls, and her plate is in fact cleared, though it does not bear much evidence of having been overly loaded. "I am saving room for dessert," she says, when she's met by a mollified but still a bit skeptical look, patting her stomach for effect.

"Based on my estimations, Wanda consumed enough calories for healthy functioning," Vision reports helpfully.

"You were watchin' her eat, man?" Rhodey asks from up-table. "That's a little creepy, just so you know."

"It's fine, Viz," Wanda says, when Vision's expression turns slightly panicked. "Come." She offers her hand. "I will make sure the little monsters teach you the _actual_ rules."

"Buck, do _you_ remember the rules?" Steve asks, as Lila and Wanda lead Vision away. This is the first year since waking up that they are actually celebrating anything. Before Bucky's return, Steve and Peggy had only sent cursory seasonal greetings and went to their respective houses of worship; last year Peggy had spent the bulk of December supporting Sharon through Michael's rapidly declining health, and the year before that, Bucky, who had gotten through Halloween okay, nonetheless had a difficult time with Thanksgiving, and had not been up for more than the barest acknowledgment that Christmas was occurring. Both years the other two members of the triad refrained from their own festivities out of solidarity.

"I think so," Bucky says, with the frown he gets when he's trying to make sure his memories are real. "It's a pretty simple game, right? I'll pick it back up, if I did forget."

"Yeah, it's pretty simple. It can just go for hours."

"Maybe back in caveman days when you had nothing else to entertain you," Tony quips; he raises his hand, snaps his fingers three times rhythmically, and the music fades out of [_Deck the Halls_](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w3CiJqqV4Xs).

"Or if you're camped out in Middle-aux-Nowhere, France, in between missions," Peggy offers, over the music changing to [_Sevivon Sov Sov Sov_](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iM7fUnqWjsA).

"Yes, I remember that!" Bucky nigh unto yelps, turning in his seat to face her. "We had to, we couldn't spare the materials to actually make a dreidel, so we had to play it like Spin the Bottle. Right?" He looks eagerly to Steve for a second opinion. "That actually happened?"

"Yep," Steve confirms with an emphatic nod, grinning at the double blessing of Bucky regaining two memories in one day, and happy ones at that; over Bucky's shoulder Peggy's face is positively glowing. "Someone _always_ had a beer bottle on hand. Usually Morita."

"How does that work?" Rhodey asks.

"Well you just pick directions," Peggy explains. "North is Nun, South is Shin...I think we had West as He and East as Gimel. And you just...spin it." She makes the motion. "Spin the bottle. Whatever it lands closest to is what you get."

"Please tell me you added kissing back into this game," Sam says.

"Well when it was just the three of _us_ , we did." Peggy's face lights up with mischief. " _That's_ what made the game go on for hours."

"There are _babies_ present," Tony scolds, setting a hand protectively on Sofia's bassinet. Peggy raises her eyebrows and clinks her glass against Bucky's as Steve's face goes bright red. "Sam, if you did get brain bleach for Christmas, I'm gonna exhort you to share it with the rest of us."

The conversation turns, much to Tony's mock relief. Rhodey begins a story of spending a Christmas in Afghanistan; Sam chimes in with a comparison, and both of them end up laughing when it comes out that both of their sisters had read the same [article](https://thefuntimesguide.com/soldierpackages/#gsc.tab=0) and sent them a CD of old _Real Men of Genius_ commercials for Christmas. Bruce describes his move to [Ladakh](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ladakh) after visiting the monasteries there, citing both access to the monasteries and the smaller population as Hulk-related motivators. A group text comes from Maria, showing her and Helen huddling close together by the [Han River, the bridges behind them still lit up to spectacular effect](http://www.whychristmas.com/cultures/south_korea.shtml) in the pre-dawn darkness, and the caption "Officially Christmas Day in SK"; a moment is taken for the group to send replies. Bucky shovels food as quickly as he can into his mouth throughout, kisses both of his partners on the cheek when he's done, and excuses himself to go play with the kids; Thor declares his interest in this game, and accompanies him. This prompts Laura to talk animatedly about Cooper's gymnastics competition and Lila's ballet class, until Nathaniel makes it plain that a diaper is in need of changing, at which point Clint gets up.

"My turn," he explains, coming around the table to lift Nathaniel out of his high chair. 

"I should check Sofia's diaper, too; it's been awhile," Pepper says, beginning to rise. 

"I'll do it," Tony says, on his feet before Pepper can straighten herself out. 

"Oh it's fine, Tony, I can--"

"Ah-ba-ba-ba-ba no. You are the official hostess, you should be concerning yourself only with official hostess-y things. I as your devoted helpmeet will tend to the child."

"Let him do it," Natasha advises, considering her next target for a bubble attack and choosing Steve. "You'll have plenty of opportunities to change diapers, believe me."

"...All right," Pepper lilts, lifting her hands away from the bassinet; Tony triumphantly reaches in and lifts Sofia, carefully, out. He takes the time to plant a smooch on Pepper before gesturing for Clint, armed with Nathaniel's baby bag, to follow him through the kitchen, towards the bathrooms. 

"Sorry, Pepper," Rhodey says, once Tony is out of earshot. "I had Sofia for longer than two minutes, so he's taking it out on you."

"It's fine," Pepper says, waving her hand. "I'd rather he be a helicopter dad than totally uninvolved," she continues, in a voice that betrays her fear that he'd turn out to be the latter. "Well." She sets her hands on the table. "Since I'm up and "official hostessing", I think it's about time for us to get the [Secret Santa](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Secret_Santa) rolling, since some of us have to head out soon."

"Won't that be cutting it close, Pepper?" Peggy asks, glancing at the watch on her wrist. "It's 5:30 now..."

"We'll just do the presents involving Sam and Rhodey," Pepper says; Rhodey being destined for Philadelphia to spend the rest of Christmas with his mother, and Sam headed for Harlem to attend his brother's church service before spending the night at his sister's apartment. "Rhodey first, since he has further to go. The rest of us can finish exchanging presents after you and Bucky and I get back." She glances back and forth between Rhodey and Sam. "Sound good, guys?"

"Sounds good," Sam says.

"Works out great, in fact, since I'm Sam's Secret Santa," Rhodey reports.

"Uh-oh," Sam says, and grins at the face Rhodey makes at him.

"Sam, who did you buy for?" Pepper asks.

"I had Vision." Sam turns in his seat, towards the small group playing dreidel. "Hey Viz!" The android looks up from where he had been putting a chocolate coin into the middle pile, having last spun shin. "I'm gonna give you your Secret Santa present before I head out. No don't get up." Vision stalls, and wilts back down to the ground. "Not now. I'll tell you when."

"And who had Rhodey?" Pepper asks. 

"Me!" Laura says, with a shy little wave of her hand. "Let me go get his present..."

She, Rhodey, and Sam rise from the table and head for the pine trees; Laura is slightly delayed while she explains to her children that they're getting their presents later, and has to hurry back to the table after finally extricating herself from their disappointment and finding Rhodey's present amid the others. 

"Rhodey, Merry Christmas," she says, nonetheless brightly, holding the package--an obvious gift basket covered in wrapping paper--out to him with aplomb.

He thanks her as he takes it, and true to form carefully unwraps the present without ripping the paper. It turns out to be a decent-sized bottle of a good year's scotch and a set of four accompanying glasses which, upon closer inspection, turn out to be engraved with his initials and a minimalist interpretation of the War Machine armor.

"Do you like them?" Laura asks, as if Rhodey isn't showing them off to everyone at the table, to the sound of impressed vocalizations. "I couldn't think of what to get you, and I haven't done glasswork in a long time, but..."

"Laura, they're awesome. You did them yourself?" Laura nods, blushing; Rhodey holds the basket up to the light, so it catches the etchings. "These are...wow, _Laura_. These are so great. Thank you so much."

Her blush deepens, especially when she hugs him, and Natasha pokes her cheek when she sits back down, taking what had been Lila's seat.

"Rhodey, we can mail those down to you, so you don't have to worry about flying them to Philly and then DC," Pepper offers.

"Oh yeah, hell no I'm not risking breaking these," Rhodey says, covering them protectively with his arms and part of his torso. The group giggles, and then full-out laughs when he drags the basket into his lap, holding it like he might a child. He eyes Sam suspiciously, to great effect, as he pulls an envelope out from underneath the basket and slides it diagonally across the table; Steve ends up playing the middleman and passing the envelope to Sam.

"Is this, like, gonna blow up when I open it...?" Sam asks.

"If it is, you're just barreling straight into your self-destruction," Steve comments, as Sam is opening the flap even as he speaks.

"That's why you and I are friends," Sam tosses back, as he removes the card from the envelope. The frontispiece shows a background of an American flag, a bald eagle bearing an old-fashioned banner proclaiming "Happy Holidays". Sam flips the card open, pushes the folded-up check out of the way with his thumb--Darlene Wilson didn't raise a boor--and reads the inside text. ""To Sam Wilson and the staff of the Washington DC VA Medical Center Psychology Services Department: I am eternally grateful for all the sacrifices you have made to keep America safe and free, and for the valiant efforts you continue to make in service of our fellow veterans' health and wellness. It is my honor to support you in your endeavor with the enclosed gift. With deepest respect and admiration, you are wished a blessed holiday season, and a New Year filled with the fruits of all your invaluable labor. Col. James R. Rhodes"." 

Sam sets the card down and unfolds the check, and then immediately puts it on the table and buries his face in his hand.

"Seriously, Rhodes?"

"I know, Rhodey's such a cheapskate, right?" Tony's back, with a freshly diapered and swaddled Sofia; Clint is still several feet behind him, Nathaniel having decided that he wanted to walk back to the party. "He basically leaves me no choice but to match it..."

Sam jerks straight up, lightly punching his left fist into his right palm, his face unreadable. "I can't..." He turns his face up to the ceiling, blinking; Steve pulls the check towards him to look at the amount, and raises his eyebrows into his hairline. " _Damn_ , it's great to know rich people."

"Wait 'til he finds out that this is an annual donation," Rhodey stage-whispers up to Tony.

"Oh my God." Sam pushes his chair back and stands up, physically unable to sit still any longer. "I cannot deal with you people. You are unreal. Absolutely 100% fictional." Steve discreetly shows the check to Peggy, who can't contain her gasp. Natasha strains her neck, and Peggy passes the check across the table for her, Bruce's, and Laura's perusal.

"Look, I just know how it is, okay?" Rhodey says, as the people to his right softly exclaim over the amount; Natasha lifts the check to show Clint as he comes up behind them. "I've seen too many good soldiers fall apart. And I don't have kids whose futures need funding, so it's not like I need to sit on that money..."

"Rub it in, why don't'cha," Sam grumbles, but his ear-splitting grin belies any sense of envy. Rhodey stands up as Sam goes around the table and pulls him almost aggressively into a hug. "Thank you, man. Thank you, Tony," he pulls away to address his other benefactor. "And I'm sure Pepper had a hand in this, too," he continues, turning to face his hostess. "Seriously, guys, this is amazing."

"Merry Christmas, Sam," Pepper says, with a pleased little smile.

"Merry Christmas, Sam," Tony and Rhodey echo.

"You." Natasha pretends to be surprised that Sam catches her pulling the neckline of her sweater away from her collar and slipping the check into her bra strap. "Gimme that." He snatches it out of her hand, refolding it carefully as he goes back to his seat. "Little thief." She puts on her best cherubic face as Sam plops into his chair, opens the check to look at the amount again, and then closes it and slips it back into the card. "Damn. Man, my gift for Vision is gonna be so underwhelming..."

"Well you know, it's the thought that counts," Tony chides, and Sam picks up a stray piece of Christmas cracker and pitches it at him.

"Here, since I'm gonna be cutting it close, let me head out first," Rhodey says, standing up. "Laura, again, thank you so much for the gift, it's really something special." She preens and accepts his thanks with a flip of her hair. "Everyone, I'm sorry I have to jet so early in the evening; it was really great seeing you all."

A counterpoint of "Merry Christmas!", "See ya!", and "Fly safe!" goes up from the table and from the little group still doggedly gambling in the corner of the dance floor. Rhodey takes a few seconds to guilt Tony into letting him hold Sofia and coo a good-bye to her befuddled little face, before taking advantage of Tony's brief moment of weakness to pretend to kidnap her. Tony, Pepper laughingly at his heels, rushes after Rhodey as he makes for the elevator, and final good-byes are called out by those left in the ballroom.

"Hey, Viz!" Vision looks up again at the sound of Sam calling his name. "C'mere." Vision does as bade, taking the seat beside Sam that Thor had vacated as Sam picks up his present for Vision from off the floor. "Happy...Merry...?" Sam tilts his head. "What is it that you actually celebrate, Viz?"

"I'm...undecided, I suppose," Vision confesses; his was one of the gold and white crackers. "I have all the knowledge of the holidays that JARVIS had and no family background to predispose me towards one or the other, so..."

"...All right, well, happy Saturday then." Sam hands the package to Vision, who regards it with some fascination--it's only his second holiday season, after all--before delicately peeling the wrapping off to reveal _Sokovian Cuisine: Sokovia's Premiere Cookbook, Adapted for the American Chef_.

"Don't think we haven't seen you trying to ingratiate yourself to a certain Ms. Maximoff," Sam says, while Vision does the closest approximation to blushing his body can do under the weight of numerous grins and one glare in particular. "ProTip: I've been told that New Year's is a good holiday for couples."

"I shall...take it under advisement," Vision says, standing up quickly and stiffly, the book clutched to his chest. "Thank you, Sam. This is a very thoughtful gift. I shall put it somewhere safe."

"Stop trying to pair her off," Clint grumbles as Vision scurries away, noticeably not heading back towards Wanda but instead for the elevator.

"She has to grow up sometime, Clint," Laura teases.

"No she doesn't." Clint hoists Nathaniel up so he straddles his father's side, resting on his hip. "None of you do, isn't that right, Nate? You'll all stay little and single forever..."

"No," Nathaniel says, as if on cue, and the whole group, less Clint, bursts into laughter.

"You really are a traitor, Nate," Clint mutters, setting his son down on Laura's lap.

"Who put Daddy in his place, hm?" Natasha coos, leaning over to address the baby. "You did, yes! You did!" Clint thumps the top of her head; she reaches up and swats his stomach.

"With that," Peggy says, as Laura scolds her partners for acting like their children, "I think we should get ready to head out. The train's going to be a nightmare; we shouldn't wait..."

"True," Sam says, standing up; Peggy rises as well. "Let Pepper know we went to grab our coats when she comes back?" he asks the group. "And that we'll meet her downstairs?"

"Sure," goes the response as Peggy leans down, cups Steve's jaw, and gives him a somewhat long good-bye kiss that leaves a mildly blissful look on both their faces. It remains on Steve's countenance for a few moments despite the chatter that picks up around him, until Bucky plows into the back of his chair and startles it off.

"See you in a bit, punk," Bucky says, when Steve tips his head back to get a better look at him.

Steve reaches his hand up, briefly squeezing the back of Bucky's head. "Bundle up, okay? It's cold out."

Bucky hums an "mmhmm" and leans forward to give Steve a less elegant kiss compared to Peggy's, but no less affectionate. Steve lets him go, straightening himself out as Bucky waves himself off and goes to meet Peggy and Sam near the elevator.

"It's good to see him this chipper," Natasha says, amused but sincere.

"You mentioned he hasn't really enjoyed this time of year since he came back," Laura tacks on, bouncing Nathaniel on her leg.

"Yeah, I think..." Steve picks up a fork, balancing it against the table on one of its tines. "Well, he doesn't like the cold weather. Wonder why." There's a round of sympathetic noises. "I think, also, he was having a hard time with the whole...sense of the holidays, you know, what they're about. Being seventy-plus years in the future without his family didn't exactly help, either."

"But he does have family, doesn't he?" Bruce asks. "Out in Indiana, I thought."

"Yeah." Steve, and later Bucky, had been heartbroken to learn that Rebecca had passed away in '98, but she left behind a decent-sized family of her own under the name of Proctor. "They were...wary, at first, about seeing him." Steve is still convincing himself that was a reasonable reaction, but it's hard when he remembers Bucky's already weak appetite disappearing almost completely between learning he had a nephew and finally being allowed to visit him. "But he's seen them a few times now. Not as much as Peggy with Sharon, but it _has_ helped, definitely. He does better when he's with people. A big party like this, like what we do for Halloween, was a good idea."

"They went to get ready," Clint says, over Steve's head, telling him that the Potts-Stark clan has returned from the roof.

"Okay, thank you," Pepper responds, and turns to Tony. "So, you just changed her, so we shouldn't have to worry about doing it again while I'm out. And she just ate so she shouldn't be hungry again soon, but if she is, I left--"

"I know, I saw."

"All right. And if--"

"Pep, I've been here for the past seven weeks, remember?"

"I'm her mother, Tony; I'm allowed to worry."

"Yes, and I'm her father; I'm allowed to know what I'm doing. And I've got three other parents in the room. You, meanwhile, have your cell. I will _call you_ if there's a problem I can't handle, which statistically? Highly unlikely. All right?"

"...All right," Pepper says, clearly still dubious despite relenting.

"Thank you. You're a good woman."

"I have to be, to put up with you."

"Such affection for the father of your child."

"I've seen worse," Clint offers, popping the little bubble the Potts-Starks have put themselves in.

"Seen worse or experienced worse?" Tony asks him, as Pepper exhorts Sofia to be good for her daddy in baby talk. She does take a moment to kiss Tony good-bye and say that they will hopefully be home before 9 pm, and then excuses herself to her guests, before putting on her best _Business Lady With an Objective_ walk to carry herself away from her boyfriend and child.

"Don't be offended, Tony, we're all like that," Laura offers.

"Offended? Never. She keeps the damn company afloat with that attitude; she can worry to her heart's anxious little content." Tony pulls out and slips into the nearest chair, which happens to be next to Steve.

"If they're going to be back closer to 9 we might want to let the kids open at least some of their presents soon," Natasha says, standing up and stretching "They're going to poop out 'cause of jet lag at some point and I don't want to deal with cranky kiddos who have to stay awake because the boring old grown-ups are exchanging presents."

"We'll put them all to bed at 8:30," Laura throws out for their consideration.

"No!" Nathaniel says again.

"Yes," Laura returns evenly. "But dessert and presents first, Mommy promises."

"No."

"All right, Nate-the-Great." Laura scoots her chair back and stands. "Help Mommy?" She glances pointedly at Clint and Natasha. " _Help_ Mommy?"

Bruce and Steve rise alongside their fellow Avengers, for want of something to do, and all five of them gesture for Tony to relax and enjoy a few quiet moments with Sofia. It doesn't take as long for dessert to come out of the kitchen, mainly because they only bring out the [sufganiyot](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sufganiyah), [delkelekh](http://mobile.nytimes.com/2006/12/13/dining/133hrex.html), and risgrynsgrot for now, and the game is quickly broken up by the presence of sweets. Thor's contribution is, surprisingly, a hit with the kids when they are convinced to try it, and the adults are treated to the news of the minor set, including how Lila has fixed the order of which Pokémon is to be her buddy based on the amount of kilometers needed to obtain candy, and of a fight Cooper witnessed at school. The announcement that they'll be allowed to open a few of their presents is saved until their dessert plates and bowls are cleared; a wise decision, as Cooper and Lila run yelling for the trees as soon as they hear, Nathaniel toddling after them as quickly as his fifteen-month-old legs can carry him. Wanda, around a mouthful of jelly doughnut, calls after them that they'll have to wait until the grown-ups are done eating, which dampers their enthusiasm somewhat, though they still start dragging the presents that look the most intriguing onto the dance floor. So as to not torture the kids for too long, their parents and Wanda finish quickly and go to join them, Vision following after Wanda much to Clint's somewhat noticeable chagrin.

Bruce excuses himself shortly thereafter, stating that since he had minimal involvement with the set-up of the party, clean-up should be his duty. Thor rises as well, expressing the desire to check in with Jane, who is with Darcy and Erik in London and planning to see him tomorrow, and then to join Bruce in the kitchen ("I have been speaking to a few Healers in Asgard about your predicament, and they've a few ideas...") Tony and Steve wave them off over the sound of a paper ripping and squeals of delight, and when Steve lowers his arm, he reaches for a stray bottle of Manischewitz that's been left on the table. 

"Surely you're not having _that_ bad a time."

Steve snorts as he pours the wine. "You know it doesn't do anything to me. I just like the taste."

"Blech." Tony makes a face. "The first sip is fine. The second..." He makes a gagging noise.

"You coulda gotten different wine, y'know," Steve muses, tipping his glass back.

Tony gives a one-shouldered shrug. "No one else has wised up to the fact that they're drinking liquefied diabetic shock. If you guys wanna kill your collective prancrei, knock yourselves out. I just ain't drinkin' it."

"You're not drinking anything," Steve says, halfway between an observation and a question.

"Uh, hello?" Tony shifts Sofia to one arm so he can reach for and brandish a bottle of sparkling cider. "2016. An excellent year."

Steve snorts, but not in the least derisively. Sofia shifts in Tony's arms, stretching her arm out of the swaddling blanket before she blinks her eyes closed; Tony waits a moment, and then tries to pull a loose flap of blanket over her free arm without disturbing her out of sleep.

"I'm glad you're doing this, Tony."

"I don't know _what_ you're talking about."

"Yes you do," Steve returns evenly, and the moon must be blue tonight because Tony doesn't release a barrage of clever bullshit in refutation. Steve leans back against his chair, almost guilty over garnering such a rare reaction, and searches for a way to alleviate the pressure that must be building up in his friend. "I mean, I guess it'd be impossible for _you_ to blow all your money on illegal booze, but..."

"There're other ways to check out on your kid," Tony murmurs, and Steve bites his lip and nods, grateful for the first time that history had not left his father's addiction a secret. Sofia makes a noise in her sleep and both men turn their gazes to watch her; Steve reaches out to run a finger delicately over the little part of her cheek that's exposed.

"She's getting so big."

"Yeah, doc said that this is around the time they start doing that," Tony says, watching as Steve carefully flicks his finger up and down the side of her face. "You wanna hold her?"

"Huh?" Steve glances, and then straightens, up. "Nah, that's, that's all right."

"Come on, I'm actually _offering_. That's, like, the Halley's Comet of Tony Stark parenting right there."

"No, no, it's okay." Steve leans back, shaking his head for good measure. "You hang onto her. I'm...I'm content."

"What, does she smell bad or something? Why don't you want to hold my kid, Cap?"

"There's nothing wrong with _her_ , Tony, I just...I don't want to."

"Oh, _tell me_ you have a tragic backstory as to why you don't like holding babies." Tony's teasing grin slowly slides off his face when Steve makes a little scoff and glances away. "Son of a...you _do_ , don't you."

Steve gives the grimmest of sardonic smiles, shifting uncomfortably. "I do, in fact."

"You wanna share with the class?" Tony asks, just slowly enough to reveal a genuine concern and an invitation to refuse.

"Ahh..." Steve considers accepting the invitation, and decides to bite the bullet instead. "My folks...my folks had two other kids besides me. My older brother, Matthew, he was stillborn; I didn't know about him for a long time. But they had my little sister, Ella, when I was...about four and a half, I think. And when she was around Sofia's age, actually, she caught polio, and she...well, she couldn't shake it."

He folds his arms tightly, chewing the inside of his lower lip. "Obviously they weren't letting me touch her at that point, but. You know me. One night I snuck into my parents' room and she, ah...she was awake in the bassinet, so I picked her up. I was just...I was just holding her and she, uh...she started to seize up." Steve swallows down a 93-year-old lump in his throat and the phantom sensation of his baby sister jerking violently in his arms, and presses on. "So I start yelling for help. Mameh comes running in, takes Ellie from me. Locks me in the room while she calls for a doctor. And then, next thing I know..."

"...Shit."

"Language," Steve teases weakly; he's found himself leaning heavily against the table.

Tony doesn't even make a face. "I guess I can see where that'd be traumatizing."

"Little bit, yeah," Steve says flatly. "I think that's really what did my dad in," he continues softly, after a quiet moment passes between them, filled up by the happy noises from the group behind them. "It's not like he was doing all that well, after the war, but he got worse after we lost Ellie, and he just...he just never got past it."

"I think it was you guys, for my dad," Tony says, after a beat; Steve's stomach clenches at the mention of Howard, but fights not to show it. "What he didn't get past. The war too, obviously, you don't help build an atom bomb and sleep easy for the rest of your life after it, but he, ah...well, based off how much he would go on and on about you guys, I think if you'd've asked him to make your trio a quartet, he would've said yes."

"...He might have asked at some point," Steve says, a vague memory flitting through his brain, and Tony makes at least a token disgusted face. "But uh...if it was a serious offer, we didn't realize it."

"Yeah, he wasn't the best with the whole making-it-obvious-that-he-actually-cares-about-you thing," Tony clips. "Particularly when he was _friggin'_ drinking." Tony shifts and then squares his shoulders, pulling Sofia higher up against his chest. "And he was a _mean_ drunk, too. He wasn't like me, where I just get sloppier and make worse decisions than normal. Well, he'd do that, too, but mainly he would just...he could tear you a new poop chute when he was drunk. Rip you apart. Basically Hulk out, without the actual. You know. Hulking."

Steve nods. He'd never seen Howard like that, but he realizes that he can see it being true. "I know what you mean. Believe me."

"I'm not gonna put Sofia and Pepper through that." Tony's looking past Steve now, towards something he hates and loves and cannot see. "Don't care what I have to do. Or not do, as the case may be. I'm not gonna do that to them. Sofia deserves better than to turn out like me."

"May I interrupt?"

Steve's mouth, open to respond, closes, and both men turn their heads to see Wanda standing a foot or two behind them, her hands clasped together prettily against the skirt of her dress.

"I have been sent to fetch Captain America," she elaborates, barely suppressing a smirk. "Lila has received the long-wished-for 72-pack of colored pencils. She has heard of the Captain's artistic prowess, and wishes to challenge him to a contest of skills. On the floor, naturally."

"Ooh, she's calling you out, Cap," Tony says, all trace of the past few minutes absent from his demeanor. "You gonna back down?"

"I've never backed down from a challenge in my life," Steve says with a laugh, keeping his eyes on Tony as he rises from his seat.

"Then go kick some seven-year-old butt," Tony says, as clear a _I'm ready to let this conversation end_ as anything else. "I'll chill here. Get to spend some time with my kid without five million other things clamoring for my admittedly coveted attention."

Wanda must notice that Steve hesitates for just a second, because when he steps away from the table she slips her arm through his and squeezes their sides together for a second, before releasing him and leading the way to where Lila has set up several pieces of paper and her newest art supplies.

Tony watches them settle on the floor; he can't quite make out their conversation, but when Steve reaches for a pencil he sees Lila scold him--she must have dibs--and then Wanda laugh at him. That earns her Steve scooting back so he can gather up more faux, and Wanda covers her face, and then her head, when Steve throws it up in the air above her. Both girls laugh when it "snows" down upon them; Wanda lightly slaps Steve's shoulder, Steve responds by tugging on a handful of her hair, and Tony seriously considers calling them back to the table, giving Steve his Secret Santa present right then and there.

"Should probably save it for when the rest of Team America gets back," he mutters after a moment, shaking his head. "Whadaya think, Iron Maiden?" he asks, glancing down.

Sofia doesn't answer except to yawn in her sleep.

"All right then. [Heavenly peace](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=2bLmGdwoT34) it is, for now. That sounds good." Her arm has come free again, and instead of a piece of blanket he covers it with his hand, gently stroking a finger against her powder soft skin, still somewhat amazed that she not only exists, but he gets to hold her. "That sounds good."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the comics, Tony was adopted; he was born in Sofia, Bulgaria, and his bio parents' names are Jude and Amanda. Since MCU Tony is clearly Howard's bio kid, I moved Jude and Amanda over to be Pepper's parents, and Sofia became his daughter rather than his birthplace. The middle name "Mariana" is obviously in honor of Maria Stark and Ana Jarvis. I established Sofia's age based on CACW, had Pepper _actually_ been pregnant; if the movie is set in May (based on the release date), and we go by the practice of not announcing a pregnancy until the end of the first trimester, that would place Sofia's birth in early November, specifically on November 5th. (I used similar methodology to give Nathaniel a 9/19/15 birthday).
> 
> Nat and Laura's shirts are based on fanart I saw of Jewish!Bucky awhile ago, but the fact that they light up is inspired by my roommate's ugly Christmas sweater, which is the model for what Clint is wearing. (She specifically requested I credit her for this.)
> 
> There's no excuse for writing Romani Jewish characters as willing volunteers for a Nazi organization, so Wanda and Pietro were abducted by Hydra instead. 
> 
> Traditional foods and customs were drawn from the following cultures: England (Pepper, Peggy, Bucky), Scotland and Wales (Bucky), Ireland and the Oneida nation (Steve), Poland and Lithuania (Wanda; analogue to Sokovia), Germany (Tony, Laura), Italy (Tony), Hungary (Tony, by way of Ana Jarvis), Russia (Natasha), and the Scandinavian countries (Thor), as well as white- (Clint, Pepper) and African-American (Sam, Rhodey) sub-cultures.
> 
> Steve follows kosher rules about what food can be eaten and in what combination; Laura feeds the family a vegetarian diet (Clint, Nat, and Wanda eat meat outside the home; Nat and Wanda follow the same food rules as Steve when eating out); Tony is 100% nonobservant. All of them will eat in non-kosher settings. I figured Bruce would have picked up vegetarianism after living in India. Feel free to imagine Bucky as either vegetarian or vegan. 
> 
> Look for Part II on or before the 24th...


	2. To Hear the Angels Sing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **TW brief allusions to suicidal ideation; mentions of animal abuse and the Holocaust**. If church services, particularly taking Communion, trigger you, then you can skip the first part of the chapter. 
> 
> The church service is based on [this](http://storage.cloversites.com/lakesidebaptistchurch/documents/Christmas%20Eve%202015.pdf), but I took some artistic liberties to aid in story flow.

Pepper was promised to her own church as an offertory collector, but whether or not Peggy and Bucky should join her, or go with Sam to his brother's church in Harlem, had been A Discussion. It was not so much the denominational differences--of which none of them were particularly aware or concerned--but a question of comfort. A congregation that Pepper was at ease calling herself a member of was, as to be expected, politely discreet and reigned-in. Peggy and Bucky still get mesmerized stares from the younger members, but even in the beginning of their tenure there, they weren't bombarded with questions or hounded by amateur paparazzi. This church was also, if not totally on board with, at least quietly tolerant of their relationship with Steve; an acceptance that was not afforded them from many other institutions.

There was also the matter of safety. It wasn't that long ago that someone sat behind Bucky at a restaurant and whispered the Winter Soldier codewords--released, like so much else, during #hydragate--in his ear. He hadn't gotten three words in before Bucky bolted; Peggy upended the table and very nearly strangled the guy while Steve paged the other Avengers and tried to chase Bucky down before he disappeared. In the end it turned out to be some kid with an incredibly cruel sense of humor, no discernible ties to any terrorist organizations, and the stupidly good luck that the codewords only trigger panic in Bucky nowadays; nonetheless, all three of them declined to leave the Tower for anything other than official business for a month afterwards.

Surprisingly enough it was Bucky who officially accepted Sam's invitation, after reminding his partners that he had to actually live in the 21st century if he wanted to be a person in it, which meant going to new places ("Don't quote me to me," Peggy had chided him, despite ultimately agreeing). How to protect themselves was the next order of business, and after some debating, Sam went to his brother to ask him not to announce their coming, and enlisted his extended family to sit near them in one of the corners near the front so their isolated presence wouldn't be overly noticeable, nor their faces terribly visible.

Sam gets them in through a side door at a strategic moment, when people would be too distracted by getting themselves settled and the organist loudly playing "[O Come, O Come, Emmanuel](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7xtpJ4Q_Q-4)" to notice the newcomers. His family--twin sister Sarah, her husband Roberto, and their children Jody and Paloma; and Layla and Jim, the wife and son of Sam's older brother Gideon--greet them kindly and close ranks around them. Bucky purposely chooses to not sit adjacent to the aisle; if he's going to interact with the future he can't be looking for the easiest escape route from it.

Unfortunately he's also picked the spot with the draft, which he discovers when he tries to take off his coat and feels a gust of icy wind blow against his neck.

He jerks his coat back on and rearranges his scarf so it covers his neck better. Peggy, to his right, slides her arm through his, fitting her hand into his, without missing a beat in the conversation she's started with Jim, whom Bucky makes out is a Hulk fan now that he's actively tuning in. He squeezes Peggy's hand to let her know that he's fine; nonetheless he's secretly relieved when she declines to release him, even when the music changes and they stand for "[O Come, All Ye Faithful](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l1wHyMR_SCA)", the Call to Worship, and the Gloria Patri. It's only when they are directed to pull out the kneelers for the Lord's Prayer that they finally separate, but they come back together once allowed to sit again.

"In _my_ day, we called this song "[Away in a Manger](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=CUBYZ-86uAs)"," Bucky whispers in Peggy's ear using his best crotchety old man voice when the church begins singing "[One Candle is Lit](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VR_rKBRzbRU%22)"; Peggy snorts loudly enough for Sam, on Bucky's left, to lean over and mock-scold them to be quiet. They do their best to look cartoonishly chastened, and join dutifully back in. They've settled back into maturity--the new lyrics, aided by the soft glow of candlelight, are the sort to lull the listener into a sense of melancholy peace--by the time the congregation is asked to stand again.

"The people walking in darkness have seen a great light; those living in the land of the shadow of death, on them light has shined." Gideon's voice is powerful, reverberating through the church in a way that seems to bypass the microphone. "You have enlarged the nation and increased their joy; they rejoice before You as people rejoice at the harvest, as men rejoice when dividing plunder. For as in the day of Midian's defeat, You have shattered the yoke that burdens them, the bar across their shoulders, the rod of their oppressor. Every warrior's boot used in battle, and every garment rolled in blood, will be destined for burning; will be fuel for the fire..."

Peggy slides her arm around Bucky's waist and rests her head on his shoulder. His breathing changes when he hears words like this, like he can't bear to listen to them and craves them all the same. It's gotten better over the past two years, since Bucky's only joined them in the field for true, all-hands-on-deck emergencies like Ultron, but the question of whether he'll ever want to come out of the reserves to be an active Avenger--whether Peggy and Steve want him to, as well--is still up in the air.

("You didn't want to enlist," Steve told Bucky once, early on in his rehabilitation, during one of the many times when he had to coax Bucky out of bed. "You weren't afraid, you just...you just really didn't want to have to hurt anyone. But we knew...we had an idea of what was going on, and you couldn't just sit around and let it happen. That's why you signed up, Bucky, you did it to help people."

"But I didn't help anyone. I _didn't_ Steve, I didn't, look at what happened...")

Sam shifts, folding his arms across his chest. Bucky twitches, nudging Sam lightly with his elbow; Sam turns his head and gives him that look, the _thanks for thinking of me but I'm fine_ half-smile that they've all perfected. Sarah, on Sam's left, puts her hand on her brother's back and kneads the space between his shoulder blades with her thumb.

"In _my_ day, we called this song "[In the Bleak Midwinter](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ZI9hc2E-d64)"," Peggy whispers, once Isaiah and Titus have had their say and the congregation sings the [Doxology](https://www.instagram.com/p/BOXMsRjBmWh/?taken-by=sweet.honey.sempai) to herald Luke. Bucky elbows her in the side, and Sam pinches her arm, but the small levity carries them through the Annunciation to the Shepherds and the short homily that follows, finally finding an appropriate outlet in "[Joy to the World](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=O5hj518Iugk)".

"The Lord be with you!" Gideon announces, after the carol has ended and the collection plate has been passed. 

"And also with you," goes the response. 

"Lift up your hearts!"

"We lift them up unto the Lord."

"Let us confess our sins to God." There's a rumble of commotion as the congregants sit, pull out the kneelers that they had put away earlier, and settle onto them. 

From the beginning Steve and Peggy and his therapist and everybody have been adamant that Bucky should stop thinking of the people Hydra put on his kill list as being his sin to confess, and he's been actively trying to do so for awhile now, so he forces himself to spend the next thirty seconds pushing the list of names out of his mind and repenting for leaving his partners and their friends to their own devices on the field, instead. Gideon speaks again, but Bucky doesn't quite register it until everyone around him says "Lord, have mercy." 

"Let us pray for peace, for the generosity of heart we know at Christmas to extend beyond this time to all times and to all peoples."

"Hear our prayer, O Lord."

"Let us remember the poor and pray for the success of all efforts to alleviate suffering, for all who are seeking justice, and for all who share their blessings with others."

Sam and Peggy feel, in turn, Bucky lightly pressing up against them for a moment. "Hear our prayer, O Lord."

Gideon leads them in prayer for the unity and leadership of church, and for the sick and lonely (Steve always pops into Bucky's head when these prayers come up; he doesn't remember it exactly, but he figures that as a kid he must have prayed for Steve at this part of the service); he then switches tack, letting them pray for themselves, "if we are alone, if we are anxious, if we are missing loved ones and long for past Christmases."

"Hear our prayer, O Lord." Peggy's voice is a little raw, and Bucky sets his hand on top of hers. His voice would be too, if he had as many clear memories of his sibling and parents as she had of hers.

"Good and gracious God, your Word becomes flesh in our midst," Gideon rounds out. "Listen to those needs we cannot express and help us to know Your presence in this holy season; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen."

"Amen." The organ starts up again, a long intro to "[O, Holy Night](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=PWfuoAmBgEs)" cuing the faithful to push coats and purses out of the way and ready themselves to stand. The program says Communion can be brought to people who remain sitting, which is what they've elected to do. An acolyte, apparently clued in to their situation, makes her way towards them with a small chalice in her right hand, a plate of shredded bread in her left. Peggy goes first, dipping the Body into the Blood and putting it in her mouth like she does almost everything; in one graceful fluid motion, like she was born to do it. Bucky is a little more clunky in his movements, and after the acolyte moves on Sam has to tell him "If you're gonna eat it, eat it, man."

"It's your right, darling," Peggy encourages, after Bucky makes a face at Sam but doesn't follow his direction. It's not the first time Bucky's tried to take Communion, but he's only managed it a few times in the past.

"...and the soul felt its worth," a soloist sings at the altar, over the heads of the people lining up. "A thrill of hope; the weary world rejoices / For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn..."

"It's not about deserving it," Peggy had said once.

"And even if it _was_ , you do," Steve had added, vehemently.

He wants to believe them, so he makes himself do it, and makes himself savor it, pressing the wine-soaked bread between his tongue and the roof of his mouth and letting it partially dissolve before swallowing the rest. Peggy squeezes his arm, beaming at him; Sam's not entirely privy to the situation, but he can tell something important has transpired, and he offers a covert thumbs up. Bucky folds in on himself a little under their pride in him, but he smiles, small and weak but real, at the floor nonetheless.

"O God," Gideon proclaims, once the last person has returned to their seat and the music has ended, "having celebrated this moment with You and with each other, and with hearts made warm and wills made strong through bread and wine, enable us to reflect the love of Christ in our hearts. Help us to celebrate His birth in gratitude, in unselfish love and cheerful service, that it may be a blessing to us and an offering of thanksgiving to You. Through Jesus Christ our Lord, amen."

"Amen," the congregants respond, and the organ leads into "[Hark, the Herald Angels Sing](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xa5O6EnJtLk)". Now would be the time for Peggy and Bucky to slip out quietly the way they came, while everyone else is distracted singing and gathering up their belongings; they make their cordial lowkey goodbyes to Sam's family and shuffle past a row of knees, following Sam out of the side door to the stairs leading up from the sidewalk.

"Enjoy yourselves?" Sam asks, as the door closes behind them.

"Very much," Peggy says. "Please tell Gideon it was lovely."

"Will do, he'll appreciate that. And hey, Buck." Bucky looks up from where he's been quietly musing at the floor. "Sorry if I was pushy, man." Bucky accepts the apology by way of a one-shouldered shrug. "I don't always take it, either."

"Yeah?"

Sam bobs his head from side to side. "Not always sure _what_ I believe," he says, in a way that illustrates his own eight-year walk through Hell perfectly. Bucky nods, and from the side Peggy makes a sympathetic noise. "But hey. If it helps you, don't cut yourself off from it, all right? Not-your-doctor's orders."

Bucky snorts. "I won't."

"Good." A gust of wind blows out, making both Bucky and Sam break out in shivers. "All right, love you both, but I'm not freezin' my ass off out here. I'll see you tomorrow night when I pop in to get my wings, all right?"

"Trying to get rid of us, I see how it is," Peggy teases, stepping in close to hug Sam. "Happy Christmas, Sam."

"Right back at you, Peg. And you too, Buck," Sam adds, when Bucky chooses not to wait for Peggy to finish and makes it a three-way embrace. "Get home safe, okay? Tell everyone I say Happy Whatever."

They assure him they will, sealing their promises with a kiss on either cheek, and Sam seems to be glowing a bit as he opens the door to step back inside. "Born to raise the sons of earth / Born to give us second birth" escapes, accompanied by the golden sound of handbells being rung, before the door shuts behind him.

They take a moment before Peggy asks "All right, darling?"

Usually when Bucky answers to the affirmative, there's always a bit of a lie to it. For this moment though, when he nods, he feels nothing but truth behind it. Peggy must feel it too, because the arm she links through his is supportive rather than insistent, and the walk back to the subway is that which is heading not to a fortress, but to a home.

*

Bucky and Peggy come back to the Tower to see Lila and Cooper fleeing from them, and a beat later, Natasha and Laura go chasing after the kids.

"...All right then," Bucky says, after a second's pause.

"They were granted a reprieve," Steve explains as he approaches them. "They were allowed to stay up until you guys came back, so they could say good night."

"Ah, I see," Peggy say, obviously pleased to be used in a deal in this manner. "Sam says Happy Whatever," she reports as soon as Steve is close enough to draw into her arms and plant a kiss on.

"Nice of him," Steve murmurs into her mouth as she pulls away and lets Bucky move in to give Steve his own, similar greeting. "How was church?"

"It was good," Bucky reports, with enough of a meaningful tone to reassure Steve's worry. "I'm glad we went," he adds, which is icing on the cake.

"Good." Steve drops another small peck on Bucky's face. "'m'happy to hear it."

"All right, you guys." The three are distracted by Natasha's stern voice, and they look over to see Laura herding Cooper towards them, Natasha beside her holding Lila by the hand, but mostly the wrist. Clint drifts behind them, holding an already passed-out Nathaniel. "You promised you would be good."

Lila pouts as she stomps over to them, and Peggy releases a little "oof!" when Lila rather forcibly throws her arms around her waist. That's warning enough for Bucky, who manages to slow Lila down enough to manipulate her into a proper hug. Cooper, being older and slightly more mature, is civilized but equally sullen as he says good night.

"Come on, the sooner you go to bed, the sooner you can give Aunt Peggy and Uncle Bucky their presents in the morning," Laura bribes.

"Oh, we get presents?" Peggy plays along.

"Yes, and I already got mine," Steve says, with a little bombast reminiscent of his USO Tour days. "A very lovely drawing of the three of us fighting a T-Rex from Lila," the artist in question can't help but preen a bit, "and a super cool bird feeder that Cooper built all by himself."

"Which is one more project than his father has ever completed," Natasha mutters.

"Hey," Clint objects. "Mean."

"Be nice, Tish-Tash," Laura scolds, and Natasha rolls her eyes. "All right. Beddy-bye time, guys. Come on..."

The kids drag their feet enough to cross paths with Pepper and Tony coming back into the ballroom from putting their own child to bed, which buys them a bit more awake time as more good-nights are exchanged. Laura is firm, though, and eventually the kids are hustled into the elevator.

"Can't tell if I'm dreading or looking forward to Sofia getting to be that age," Pepper murmurs, once the doors close behind them.

"Dreading," Tony says definitively, before turning rather abruptly towards Bucky and Peggy. "Hey, glad you're back. Did you guys know that your boyfriend's mentioned in a [Hanukkah song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xDV_reO930A)?"

"Tony, no, please..." is Steve's plaintive cry, drowned out by his partners' curious inquiries.

"All us Jew-vengers are, in fact," Tony presses on, as Steve's face goes pink and he mimes strangling Tony with his hands. "I just found this out while you were away, actually, and I assure you, it's hilarious."

"I need to hear this," Bucky says, and Steve turns his mime-strangling onto Bucky.

"Friday? Cue music. Like we discussed."

"Friday, _don't_ \--" Steve is cut off by Peggy's hand slapping over his mouth.

"Hanukkah is / The festival of lights," Adam Sandler explains over a simple little tune on an acoustic guitar. "Instead of one day of presents / We get eight crazy nights / And when you feel like the only kid in town / Without a Christmas tree / Here's a list of people who are Jewish / Just like you and me~"

"Oh my Lord," Pepper mutters, already prepared to give a true cringe of secondhand embarrassment.

"Skip forward a bit," Tony calls to Friday, and the old-fashioned squeal of a recording being fast-forwarded fills up the air, followed by a moment of white noise and Steve's loud groan.

"Tony Stark's half-Jewish / Natasha Romanoff's half, too / Put them together / That's one friggin kick-ass Jew!" The audience on the track breaks into cheers and applause while Peggy and Bucky snicker. Tony raises his fist in the "rock on" gesture. "And it gets better / You know Steve Rogers? / He said "Oy gevalt" when he learned / That Brooklyn lost the Dodgers!"

"I did _not_!" Steve squawks indignantly, as Peggy and Bucky burst out laughing.

"You can tell Santa Clause to go piss off!" Tony sings boisterously along as Steve folds his arms and glares at his partners. "'Cause you can eat latkes with Wanda Maximoff!"

Wanda, from where she's sitting at the table picking at her second helping of dessert, releases a loud squeal and covers her face with her hands.

"That is literally the best thing I've ever heard in my entire life," Bucky attempts to deadpan, his voice thick with choked-back laughter, as the recording fades out.

"It's not funny!" Steve yelps. "Real people hear this! In _this_ century!"

"We know, that's what makes it amazing," Peggy snickers, her face screwed up.

"You know what? I hate you both."

"Ste~ve," Bucky wheedles. "Come on, don't be a baby."

"Nope! Nope, I'm done. Finished. We had a good run, I thank you for your time, but the seventy-year love affair is over."

"[Everybody betray him, he fed up with this worl!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DxWkfJ4uvV0)" Tony says, in an accent Steve can't and refuses to even attempt to demystify as he strides away. Peggy and Bucky, of course, stumble after him, cornering him by the table and forcing him to sit down between them and endure their highly amused presence.

"I understand your consternation, Steve," Thor, also seated, says with a sympathetic grimace. "The songs written about a great warrior should not be so trivial. At least, not the first few."

"Shall we take this to mean that you have songs, plural, written about you?" Bruce asks mildly to Thor's right, as Steve's face plants itself firmly in his hand.

Clint, Laura, and Natasha come back to find Steve unmoved and Thor belting out something not quite intelligible but rather impressive and obviously funny, as he explodes into laughter at the end of the line. Natasha mutters something about needing a glass of wine if this is what the rest of the evening is going to look like, and is immediately bombarded with requests to bring out the entire bottle. She does, but pours herself a calculatedly generous amount just to watch the others squirm first before handing the bottle over to be passed around the table. Peggy remembers being promised [trifle](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trifle), and gets up to search the kitchen for it; she is far less mean with the sharing of the dessert than Natasha was of the wine. Steve does look up eventually, when it's announced that there's one delkelekh left; he takes it off the platter for himself and, catching the brief flash of disappointment on Wanda's faces, tear it in half and hands the slightly bigger portion to her before she has time to politely refuse. This leads to Steve getting teased about leaving Peggy and Bucky for Wanda, and he has to be prevented from getting up and stalking away once again.

It's when Pepper stifles a yawn that Vision gets antsy, and when there's a lull in conversation he cuts in with, "Everyone, I do believe we have a Secret Santa exchange to get to?"

"Ah, yes," Tony says through a mouthful of sufganiyah, leaning back in his chair. "We should probably get to that," he continues, after pushing the bite of doughnut into his cheek with his tongue.

"Where do you wanna set it up?" Bruce asks. "Here at the table?"

Tony points to the side of the room decorated to look like the old view from the Malibu mansion. "We're spending [Hanukkah in Santa Monica](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LslsgH3-UFU), my smashy friend. This part of it, anyway."

"Oh God," Pepper mutters, rubbing her face. "Run. Save yourselves."

"Wearing sandals, lighting candles by the sea..."

Natasha is the first to escape. Others have to shovel food in their mouths and toss back the rest of their drink while Tony serenades them about spending Shavuos in East St. Louis, but they're all headed towards the eastern winter that Tony reportedly can't endure before he begins discussing where he holidays for Purim. It takes a few moments for everyone to find their gift and make their way over to the "beach"--where the sand, unlike the faux, is merely a projection from overhead--but a loose circle is formed within a few minutes, with Pepper and Natasha having managed to nab the two beach chairs, and everyone else resigned to sitting on the floor. The few chats that have sprung up between leaving the table and settling at the beach die down, and after a moment of transitional quiet Pepper clears her throat.

"Vision? Why don't you start us off?"

"Ah, yes," Vision says, seemingly a little startled, and Wanda giggles good-naturedly to his left. "I was the last to receive a present, in any case; I suppose it's only fitting that I give a present next." He lifts up a large gift bag that Pepper had helped him pick out for everyone's read. "I was assigned Bucky, in the Secret Santa pool."

"Awesome, me first," Bucky says, sliding his legs underneath his body so he can kneel and then lean over the floor, to reach the middle of the circle where Vision is holding out the bag. Once he resettles he pulls out the artfully stuffed tissue paper--also a product of Pepper's coaching--and tips the bag over, pouring out its contents: a winter hat, scarf, gloves, socks, and a jacket, all in a rich blue color and each, upon closer inspection, sporting something that looks like an electric port. Shaking the bag a little further produces a small plastic baggie of chargers, presumably to match.

"I have been informed that you sometimes have a...problem, with colder temperatures, beyond what is typical for a human," Vision says, watching Bucky spread the individual items out on his lap as best he can, to study them further.

Bucky snorts. "Yeah, you...you ain't just whistlin' Dixie there, buddy." Where Peggy has crying fits that can go for an hour or more and Steve gets the unbearable urge to run and keep running until it hurts, Bucky's "episodes" involve a sudden, bone-deep chill that starts in his chest and spreads throughout his entire body, taking him out of the present; out of time and space itself, it seems like. Recovering from them usually requires being pressed into bed by his partners, with every warm thing in their suite either turned on, draped over him, or coaxed down his throat.

"These are all designed to be warmed up by charging," Vision continues. "At 100% battery life they will stay warm for twelve hours. Miss Potts helped me pick these out, and she assures me they are soft and comfortable enough to sleep in as well as wear out."

Bucky presses his lips together and nods slowly. He picks up the jacket, noting that it's thin enough to be worn inconspicuously under other clothes or on a windy day in spring or fall, and also that its color matches that of his SSR jacket, which he still doesn't quite recall on his own, but has seen on the mannequin in their exhibit at the Air&Space Museum, and become rather attached to nonetheless.

"If you look, there's a flap on the fingers of the gloves that can be pulled out of the way," Vision says eagerly, and indeed there's a small hood that, when pushed up, would expose the wearer's fingertips. "So you would still be able to use your sense of touch directly, should you need to."

Like for Peggy's hair, or Steve's skin, or Pancakes's fur, all of which are used to help guide his mind back home. Bucky tries to speak, but has to swallow before he manages to croak out, "Thanks, pal. This's...this is really something. Thank you."

Vision smiles, small but bright, as Bucky decides to pull on the gloves; Wanda leans over and whispers "Good job" in Vision's ear as Steve and Peggy inch closer to Bucky on either side, softly exclaiming over his gifts. Bucky uses their proximity to take their faces in his hand and kiss them, Steve first and then Peggy; before he gathers everything up but the gloves, folds them neatly back into the bag, and plops the bag on Steve's lap. Steve grumbles at him as he turns around, covering for Bucky clearing his throat while he reaches for his own offering in hand.

"I got--" He has to clear his throat again. "I got Thor, for Secret Santa." He holds up the box in Thor's direction. "Here you go, man."

Thor, unlike Rhodey and Vision before him, makes no pretense at unwrapping his present neatly, though he does take care with opening the box, in case he needs it to transport the present home. He lets out a hearty guffaw once he finally removes his gift from the box and brandishes it at Bucky: a large, white coffee mug with **_ANOTHER!_** emblazoned across the cup. 

"You have spoken to Jane, I see."

"I couldn't think what to get you, so I called her up for ideas," Bucky says, with a sheepish grin. "She told me about when you first showed up, and I thought...well, here, throw it on the floor. Trust me, do it. You'll see."

Thor does as bade, and instead of shattering as expected, the cup bounces a few feet in the air above their heads, before coming back down into Thor's waiting hands amid laughter and exclamations.

"You have Tony to thank for that."

"Easy enough contraption to invent; surprised no one did it sooner," Tony says; Bucky had come to him with the idea early this month, and he'd had it ready within a few hours. 

"Thank you, both of you," Thor says warmly, raising the cup in Tony's and then Bucky's direction. "I'm sure Jane and Darcy will be most amused to see this tomorrow. This will be a pleasant reminder of my time on Earth when I return to Asgard." Bucky gives him a thumbs-up, and he carefully places the cup back in the box, out of respect for the giver more than care for the gift now that the cup has proven indestructible, and picks up a bottle-shaped item wrapped in burlap and adorned with a rather extravagant bow. "And now, my turn. My gift is for Pepper Potts."

"You tryin' to get my woman smashed, Ken Doll?" Tony asks, while Pepper leans around Bruce to take the present.

"On the contrary; this will be beneficial to her," Thor says, as Pepper undoes the ribbon and pulls the bottle free of the burlap. "Well, beneficial for her in ways that alcohol does not provide."

"What is it?" Pepper asks, turning the unmarked bottle over in her hands, in case there's an inscription that she's missed.

" _That_ is a tonic used by nursing mothers in Asgard," Thor explains. "I overheard my own mother extol its virtues to one of her ladies-in-waiting who had then-recently given birth." He allows himself a sad smile before he continues. "According to her, and to every other mother whose opinion I sought, it aids all possible aspects of motherhood. I heard tales of how this one's sleep was more restful; that one felt more alert during the day; yet another who swore that the quality of her mother's milk was improved by taking it."

"We can vouch for Asgardian sleep aids, Pepper," Steve offers helpfully, he and his partners having been the recipients of a different but not dissimilar tonic from Thor. "They're...excellent, basically."

"The benefits, so I'm told, also pass on to the child," Thor continues. "If the stories are true, you should see the little one sleep more soundly, and perhaps learn and grow more rapidly, for having nursed it through you."

"This isn't gonna turn either of them into demi-goddesses, is it?" Tony asks. "If I get struck down with a lightning bolt I'm gonna blame you."

"It won't," Thor laughs. "Though I did consult with the apothecary as to the proper dosage for a human," he addresses Pepper. "One spoonful should be enough." And indeed, tied to the neck of the bottle is a small spoon, worth about a quarter teaspoon in capacity. "I've been told it tastes as lilies smell; I hope that is palatable to you."

"Thor, this is so thoughtful," Pepper says, running her hands over the bottle, electing not to tell him that she'll be feeding Sofia with already pumped milk until she sees what effect it has on her own person, first. "Thank you so much." Her cheeks go a little pink, despite her misgivings, and she fans her face with her hand as she tries to blink back the prickles at the corner of her eyes. Tony urging her not to cry backfires, and a tear escapes; she weakly pushes him one-handedly, and then picks up a manila envelope from her lap and plops it down unceremoniously in Bruce's.

"I'll assume this is for me," he says, letting the group laugh softly as he opens the envelope and draws out..."A map?"

"Look at what's circled," Pepper says, now sufficiently recovered, though she still swipes a hand across her eyes.

Bruce inspects the map further, spotting a tiny circle wrapped around an even tinier speck of brown, and squints at it. Tony is about eight notes into humming the Jeopardy theme song when Bruce looks up at Pepper again.

"You bought me an island?"

"God _damn_ ," Clint says under his breath, as nearly everyone else's jaw drops.

" _Technically_ , the island is for the whole team," Pepper says. "So we all will have to spend some time there for at least nominal Avengers business. Training exercises and the like."

"Oh, well, twist our arms, why don't you?" Peggy cuts in, with an incredulous laugh.

"Put a gun to my head," Steve adds.

Pepper makes a face at them. "The island is near Hawaii," she addresses the group, "The land is currently undeveloped besides a dock and a few hurts, but there's a landing pad under construction. The plan is to put up a facility like the compound upstate, and a smaller, actually livable year-round home, for Bruce." She folds her hands in her lap as she looks at Bruce again. "We don't want you to isolate yourself from the world, but you more than any of us have a... _physiological_ need for a retreat. Once construction is completed you should be able to come and go from the island as you and...the "Other Guy"," she uses air quotes, "find necessary for your well-being, air traffic control permitting. It would be a good place to decompress after missions, or if you feel the need to escape civilization for a bit."

"Congratulations, you are now the primary tenant of the world's most pristine panic room," Tony says, with a grin. After a moment, he adds, "I think we broke him."

Bruce stutters a few nonsense syllables for a second or two before words finally come out. "I can't...I can't say that I'm _surprised_ ; this is absolutely in-character for you guys, but I'm..."

"Stunned? Astounded? _Flabbergasted?_ " Clint offers.

"Yeah those sound good."

"If I don't get Pepper as my Santa next year I'm gonna cry," Clint mutters.

"I feel like "thank you" isn't gonna cover it," Bruce says, ignoring Clint getting thumped on the head by Natasha.

"Hey, don't get a swelled head; it _is_ for all of us," Tony admonishes. "Which means, kids?" He glances around at the assembled group. "What do you say to Mommy?"

"Thank you, Pepper," comes in spats between still-stunned chuckles and under-breath commentary.

"We have pictures of the island," Pepper says as the voices die down, keeping her enthusiasm deliberately muted. "We can show you them later. I didn't include them in the packet because I...well, I didn't know when it would come in the Secret Santa and I didn't want to derail _too_ much. So Bruce, we can go over any specifications for your house later, when the party's over."

"Any specifications..." Bruce shakes his head and turns his gaze heavenward. "Laura." He holds his gift out to her blindly, one hand being clapped over his eyes. "Take this. Please. Pepper..." he says, as Laura crawls across the circle for, and back to her spot with, her gift. "I...Thank you. This, this is truly amazing."

"You're welcome, Bruce," Pepper says, with a warm voice and a soft wink. Laura lets them have the moment, tearing off the wrapping paper as noiselessly as she can, but she lets out a tiny squeak when she sees what she's received.

"I've _missed_ this!" she says like she's greeting an old friend, holding up a pristine copy of _[The Jew in the Lotus](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Jew_in_the_Lotus)_ for the group to see. "Thank you."

"I didn't just want to replace it," Bruce says, a tad sheepishly; her old copy that she had lent him having been destroyed in a brief but intense Hulk incident. "So, um....open up the front cover."

She does, and lets out a happy little laugh. "It's signed!" she announces, showing the author's signature off to her partners before hugging the book to her chest.

"I wrote the author," Bruce explicates. "He was good about it."

"You don't say no to the Hulk, just throwin' that out there," Tony comments.

"Oh, this is so great, Bruce, thank you!" Laura squeals; he manages a bright albeit little smile at her as she wiggles her upper body giddily. "Between this and the prospect of a Hawaiian vacation..." The group laughs, and she's beaming when she sets the book in her lap, her arms still crossed possessively over it. "Okay. So. I already gave _my_ present to Rhodey, so. Who wants to go next?"

"Um, Steve," Tony says, a bit like a proclamation. "Steve next."

"Ooh, yes, Steve next!" Laura says eagerly, and beside her Natasha is grinning.

"Okay..." Steve says, casting a befuddled glance at Tony before turning to Laura with a smile to complement her enthusiasm. "My gift is for Clint."

"That explains why these two are pulling the giddy schoolgirl act," Clint says, reaching around Laura and Natasha to take hold of another envelope. "If this isn't an island I'm gonna be severely disappointed, Cap, just so you know."

Steve makes a face at him, and then catches at the envelope, before Clint can take it fully. "Now just so you know, Clint, I _did_ run this past Laura and Natasha and they gave the okay, so you don't have to worry about that. But if you don't want it, that's all right too; I'll find you something else for you before you head back home."

"O...kay...?" Steve relinquishes the envelope, and Clint sits back in his place, blinking at Steve's weird behavior. Laura bounces side-to-side on her hips, and Natasha slides an arm around her waist, steadying her as they both watch him unclasp the envelope and draw out an 8x11 photograph. His eyes slowly go wide as he realizes what he's looking at, and he brings the photo down to his lap as he looks up. "You...you got me a dog."

"He's a rescue dog that I'm sponsoring," Steve says; that was the deal he had cut with the shelter in exchange for them holding this particular pooch. "So if you want him, I just need to go down to the shelter with you and give them the okay for you to take him."

"Holy _crap_..." Clint looks back down at the picture again, running his fingers over the dog's ear.

"His name _was_ Arrow, but they've been calling him Lucky down at the shelter because...uh, well, he survived his previous owner, ah...throwing him into oncoming traffic. That's why his eye..." Indeed Lucky's left eye is closed tightly, whereas his right is open wide; Clint's own eyes narrow into a near murderous glare. "But he's very friendly, he's not vicious or skittish at all. And aside from the eye he's healthy. Got all his shots and everything. And he's fixed."

"You're both okay with this?" Clint asks, looking at Laura and Natasha.

"The kids've been begging for a dog for years," Natasha says with a practiced shrug. "We've got the space and the money, so..."

"And, honestly, honey, I'd like the company, too," Laura tacks on, glancing back and forth between her husband and their girlfriend. "It can get pretty lonely when you two are away. Having a dog to cuddle up with at night would be a big comfort to me."

"He _is_ apparently a big cuddler," Steve puts in.

"Wait, we're letting him on the bed?" Natasha asks. "When did that happen?"

"You can't _not_ let a dog on the bed, Nat; that's like not letting a kid on the bed," Clint admonishes.

"So you do want the dog?" Steve asks.

"The hell kinda question, _yes_ I want the dog!" Clint attempts to fist-punch the air with the hand that's holding the photograph. "Look at this guy! He's _scrappy_." He hands the photo to Wanda on his right; she coos over it and shows it to Vision, who attempts to ape her reaction despite not having the human instinct to adore puppies. "Steve, this is _awesome_. You are totally forgiven for not getting me an island."

"You're welcome?"

" _Yes_ , thanks, thank you. Oh, man. When do we go get him?"

"Anytime before you guys leave. He's apparently okay with riding in cars, despite...well, all of that. So they're thinking he'll fly well..."

"Let's get him tomorrow," Clint addresses his partners. "We'll take the kids out to eat, and get the dog on the way back."

"If Tony and Pepper are okay with us keeping him here," Laura says, mindfully.

"Well I've known about this for awhile," Pepper says with a laugh. "It's perfectly fine with me."

"There're already three cats, a giant fish tank, and probably the Batcave in the building, might as well have a dog for a few days," Tony says, waving his hand dismissively. "S'long as he stays in your suite I don't see the problem."

"That settles it. We're getting a dog tomorrow." Laura and Natasha are beaming to see him so happy, and Clint throws his arms around them, squeezing them both in one go. Wanda moves to join in the pile and hesitates; Clint catches it from the corner of his eye and, when he releases his partners, turns to her and draws her into a quick but tight bear hug, and tussles her hair for good measure once he lets her go. "Thank you guys, both of you," he says to Tony and Pepper, before looking to Steve. "Aw man, Steve, I wish I was _your_ Secret Santa, but I got Peggy in the draw..."

"It's okay," Steve laughs, as Clint reaches behind him and then hauls a long, somewhat tubular package to the front of him, which he holds out to Peggy without ceremony, still distracted by the idea of the dog waiting for him.

"I think I know what this is..." Peggy drawls, tearing into the wrapping paper with finesse but no especial delicacy once the present is handed to her. "Oh, I was right!" 

"Hey, you said you wanted to learn," Clint says, finally tearing his eyes away from the photo of Lucky, giving a grin as Peggy pulls an arrow from the quiver she's unwrapped, laid in her lap along with the folded-up bow, and lets everyone admire it. "I figured we've got a week; I'll take you down to one of the practice rooms, set up some targets and at least teach you the basics...please don't do that."

Peggy has handed the arrow to Bucky, who is twirling it between his fingers like a baton. He balks, opening his eyes wide and innocent as Clint stares him down.

"You gotta let _Peggy_ do that first, it's _her_ Christmas gift."

"Oh." Bucky turtles apologetically. "Sorry, doll."

"You better not've cursed it," Peggy warns, as Bucky sets the arrow back in her hand. She attempts to weave the arrow through her fingers as deftly as Bucky had; this results in an uncomfortably configured hand and an arrow that clatters to the floor a few seconds later.

"Slick," Tony quips, and then ducks as Peggy picks the arrow up and fakes throwing it at him.

"Thank you so much for this, Clint," Peggy says, her composure instantly regained as she slides the arrow back into the quiver. "I really appreciate it."

"Happy to oblige," Clint says, giving her a mock-salute.

"And now..." Peggy turns, setting her present down behind her, and picking up an envelope in it's place, "...fittingly enough, I got Natasha in the draw."

"I'm beginning to notice a pattern here," Natasha laughs, reaching around Steve and Bucky to take her gift. "Thank you, Peggy." She opens the flap unceremoniously as Peggy accepts her thanks, shuffles the paper out of the envelope, and three seconds later thumps Laura on the head when she starts giggling. "You're letting us bring _two_ animals home, Laura Rose?"

"Hey, three kids, a dog, and a cat is the quintessential American family, isn't it?" Laura asks.

"Watched over by the loving eye of a father and a mother and another mother," Clint says sagely.

"You do have a _farm_ , after all," Peggy says. "It stands to reason that there will be multiple animals on it. I mean, Clint's not enough in that respect."

"What're the specs?" Natasha asks, looking at her gifter as Clint throws up his hands in exasperation.

"Same as Lucky. Fixed, has her shots, healthy. Her name is [Liho](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Likho)," Peggy says. "The name, obviously, caught my eye immediately."

Natasha snorts. "Evil fate, huh? That's ominous."

"She escaped one," Peggy says, modulating her voice to be appropriately delicate. "Her...previous owners...tried to drown her as a kitten." Natasha's lips part, pulling in a noiseless but sharp breath. "Someone found the bag and pulled it out of the river; Liho was the only survivor of the litter."

"I knew we had to have her when Peggy told us about that," Laura says gently, slipping her hand into Natasha's and squeezing it, hard. "And how cute is this now, besides? Lucky and Liho. A watchdog and a barncat."

"You know Laur and her matching initials thing," Clint says encouragingly.

Natasha bobs her head, but doesn't answer immediately. Laura switches from squeezing Natasha's hand to running her fingers over Natasha's hair; after another few seconds of silence she glances at Clint, her lips pinching into a worried frown.

"Nat?" Clint prompts gently. "You all right there?"

Natasha inhales deeply, resetting herself, and considers the photograph again. "The kids are going to lose their minds."

"Oh I can't wait to see their faces," Clint says, his excitement colored vibrantly by relief. "Best Chrismanukkah ever."

"And if your dog gets to sleep in our bed, so does my [koshechka](http://www.wikihow.com/Say-Cat-in-Russian)," Natasha says, brandishing the photo at him.

"Uh-oh," Clint says, tapping Laura's shoulder. "She whipped out the _koshechka_. We're about to lose our wifey to a cat."

"We'll learn to share," Laura says, throwing her arms around Natasha's shoulders and squeezing her tightly. "We already did once, after all."

"Seriously, did anyone get or give brain bleach? Anyone at all?" Tony pipes up.

"Don't be hatin'," Clint says, sidling up close to Laura and reaching up for Natasha's hip, but not getting a good enough hold and settling for her thigh, instead.

"Not everyone is cut out to be in a triad, Tony; there's no need for jealousy," Peggy puts in, similarly snuggling up to Bucky; Steve gives an embarrassed little laugh as he also scoots over closer to his boyfriend. 

"Natasha, please have mercy and give your giftee their present. Give us something else to focus on while the six of you make merry."

"You wouldn't be invited to watch, anyway," Natasha returns smoothly, setting the wrapped box on her lap onto the floor and pushing it so it slides diagonally across the circle and lands at Wanda's knees. "Happy Hanukkah, Wanda."

"Thank you," Wanda responds politely, behind a giggle.

"I'm sorry, why wouldn't I be invited? I'll have you know I'm an excellent voyeur."

Banter passes between Tony and Natasha, fueled by commentary from Pepper and Clint, while Wanda peels off the wrapping paper and struggles to untape the gift box without using her powers. Vision attempts to help, to not much avail, and finally Wanda thanks him for his help and flicks a finger, searing off the tape in a few sparks of red. Shaking the lid off the box leads to a thin layer of white tissue paper that, when pulled back, reveals the breast of a scarlet-colored trench coat.

"Oh, my," Wanda says, cutting off the quibbling between her teammates. " _Natasha_ , this is lovely. Where did you hide this in the house?"

"I didn't. I had it made special here in the city; it never set foot in Illinois." Natasha watches Wanda run her hand over the soft material for a moment, until her eagerness gets the better of her. "Look at the back."

"Hm? All right..." Wanda picks up the coat, letting it unfold in the air before she turns it over and smooths it out on her lap. Embroidered in silver, covering the area between shoulder blades and tail bone, is a vaguely familiar symbol; Wanda looks up and tilts her head at Natasha. 

" _That_ is the symbol of [Mercury](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/2/2e/Mercury_symbol.svg)," Natasha says. "The planet, in astrology."

"Ah." Wanda's expression becomes differently, but not less, befuddled, and Natasha lets her face and voice go soft.

"Mercury the element used to be called quicksilver."

"...Oh," Wanda croaks faintly, touching her hand to her mouth. She looks at the coat again, like she's eager to drink the sight in, but her vision blurs wetly, and her hand drifts up to rub at her eyes. Vision's hand hovers uncertainly over her back until he works up the moxy to rest it on her shoulder in what he hopes is a comforting way; she shoots him a grateful look before drawing the coat up and hugging it to her chest.

"I thought you would like to have him with you," Natasha says gently.

Wanda nods into the coat, attempting to smile when she's blinked back enough tears to look up. Since moving to the farm she's seen enough of Natasha's personal jewelry--the arrow necklace, the pin shaped like a wreath, the charm bracelet sporting tiny metal moons and hearts and ballet slippers--to know how deeply runs the thought behind a gift like this. She tries to say "Thank you" but only manages to mouth the words; that seems to be enough for Natasha, who smiles at her and sits back in her chair with a nod of her head.

Wanda is aware of the respectful, tentatively warm quiet that surrounds her and she takes full advantage of the moment given to her to recover; she lifts the coat high above her head and shakes it out, before pulling it on and clasping the middle button. Of course Natasha would have figured out her dimensions without once pulling out a tape measure; it fits not just perfectly, but comfortably, lacking fitted shoulders and surprisingly not very stiff, for a never-worn coat. Wanda supposes that Natasha, characteristically, had considered function just as much as sentiment, and this does get at least a quirk of the lips out of her as she picks up her own offering and holds it out.

"My gift--" Her voice is garbled, and she clears her throat; coughing brings up a few more tears, which she wipes away with the heel of her palm. "My gift is for Tony."

As she leans past Vision and Pepper to hand Tony the box, she can see in his face that he has a sarcastic remark ready and chooses to withhold it. For that she is grateful.

"I had one like this when I was little," she continues, after Tony starts tearing off the wrapping paper. "My family took a trip to Israel and I got it as a souvenir."

Tony has the box open, the tissue paper pushed out of the way. The rest of the circle can see his lips purse, and then turn inward, to be bitten.

"What happened to yours?"

"Hydra took it from me." Tony nods, mildly grateful to be able to filter the guilt through Hydra first. "I got a new one for myself, after I settled down here, and when I drew you for Secret Santa I thought that...you might want to have one, as well."

"What is it?" Steve asks from across the circle, craning his neck. 

"It's a [hamsa](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hamsa#Symbolism_and_usage)," Tony says, raising the box to shoulder height to show off a bright blue ceramic hand, fingers spread and a stylized eye painted into the palm. "Um, also known as the Hand of Miriam. Don't know if they had these in the US back in the Dark Ages when you were a kid, but it's um...it's an amulet. For protection."

"It wards off the Evil Eye," Wanda elaborates, the corner of her mouth quirking.

Tony releases a little snort, bringing the box back down to his lap and staring down at it. "That's apt," he mutters, and Wanda makes a little noise allowing him the wry observation. "Thank you, for this," he says, after a minute, glancing up at her. "I...appreciate it. I really...really do."

"I'm glad," Wanda says lightly. Clint clasps a hand over her shoulder, jostling her a little, to let her know that he's proud of her.

"Makes what I'm about to do even better," Tony mutters, and while the others register what he said he takes hold of Pepper's armrest and hauls himself to his feet. "All right. Like the eagle-eyed observers you all are, you have probably deduced that I am Steve's Secret Santa. And Cap," he jabs his finger in the air towards Steve. "You ought to know that you are very, _very_ difficult to shop for."

"Accurate," Bucky says, and Peggy nods.

"Sorry?" Steve says, giving his partners the stink-eye. Bucky lightly punches Steve's arm by way of semi-sincere apology.

" _Anyway_ ," Tony says pointedly, bringing their attention back to him. "I wasn't going to let Cap best me at this or any other challenge, so I penciled some time into my exceedingly busy schedule to ponder the question of what to get Steven Grant Rogers for Hanukkah, 2016. And while I was so pondering, I called on Friday for aid, and that's when she pointed out something very interesting to me. But before I tell you what it was, we need to go back in time a bit. If you all could just scooch back a little..." A murmur of curiosity ripples through the group, but they all do as bade as Tony shoos them for good measure. "Friday? Cue Operation DeLorean."

The lights overheard dim quickly except for one projecting a bright white light onto the floor in the negative space of the circle, replacing the image of the sand. As the Avengers watch, a series of lines in the shape of a loose pyramid, three on Steve's lefthand side and five on the right, appear in the white space.

"So Steve." **STEVE** appears on the third line on the right side, soon accompanied by a picture of the face Steve pulled when he saw Peggy and Bucky's Ironette costumes at last year's Halloween; the group, minus Tony and Steve, burst into laughter. "That's you. And this..." **SARAH** suddenly appears on the second line, along with a much more dignified, black-and-white picture of her face. "Is your mother."

Steve's next breath comes out heavy and uneven, jerking back into his body like it was tied to an elastic. Bucky immediately sets his hand in Steve's leg and seeks out his hand, and Peggy gently pushes a few presents out of her way as she moves to put herself on his other side.

"And this is _her_ mother." Peggy settles next to Steve, winding her arms around one of his and resting her head on his shoulder, as **CHAYA** appears on the top line on the right hand side. "I couldn't find a picture."

"I don't think there _are_ any pictures of her left," Steve somehow manages to get past the dry ground that his throat has become. He'd had to leave most of things in the apartment when his mother forced him to leave after the tuberculosis became symptomatic and therefore contagious; what he hadn't taken with him had been destroyed by the strongest advice of the Health Department. The few personal effects he had saved had been entrusted to the Barnes upon leaving for Camp Lehigh, and most of them had been lost to collectors, museums, friends, garbage cans, and attics of houses that were moved out of over the past seventy-three years.

"Is there a point to this exercise, Tony?" Peggy asks, her tone taking on a sharp edge.

"Oh I'm building up to something, no worries," Tony assures. "So, Steve. Your mother," Sarah's name and picture are highlighted, "was born in Ireland and emigrated to America in 1904. But _her_ mother," the highlight moves to Chaya's name, "had emigrated to Ireland from Lithuania in 1890...something, I forget what year exactly, with her husband. In doing so she left her extended family behind, including..." the name **MATISYAHU** appears to the right of Chaya's, "a brother, who would go on to have a son," **YEHUDA** , "who, in turn, would have several children, his youngest being a daughter." **EDITA**

"I'm aware of my family tree, Tony," Steve says in a low voice. 

"You assume this little history lesson is solely for _your_ benefit," Tony says, wagging a finger at Steve. "And you know what they say about assuming. In any case. Edita is about, mm, twelve, give or take, by the time everyone's least favorite fighting Fuhrer shows up."

"Tony," Bucky growls, his metal hand clamping over Steve's suddenly rigid shoulder. Of course he would forget the names of his own cousins, but get back the cause for Steve's desperation to get overseas and his own reason for enlisting: Steve, and Sarah before she passed, worrying themselves into fits over the family left overseas as letters stopped coming and the newspapers began running increasingly ominous stories out of Europe.

"I promise, I promise you're going to like where this goes," Tony says in a rush, making a supplicating gesture with his hands. "Just let me finish. Please."

Bucky and Peggy look to Steve, and jostle him when he doesn't immediately respond; he makes a strange noise and a quick nod, and Bucky makes sure his voice is cool when he says "All right."

"Okay. So. Edita...Edita gets lucky." A small rainbow appears next to Edita's name. "She wrangles a visa to [Japan](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chiune_Sugihara) by way of the USSR when things start to go south. But in Soviet Russia, visa exits you, I guess, because she never makes it all the way to Japan. She does manage to [evade](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Holocaust_in_Russia#World_War_II) the Nazi's grabby hands, however, and once the dust settles she finds herself living in a nice little [Soviet Republic](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Republics_of_the_Soviet_Union) that we know today as Sokovia."

Wanda releases a sharp, high gasp, her hands flying to her mouth. 

"Edita marries someone named Yaakov," Tony continues, as Steve watches Wanda's eyes start to fill with tears. "They have a few children, including, in the late 50's, a son named Erik." The name appears on the wall. "Erik grows up and marries a lady named..."

"Magda," Wanda chokes, nearly sobs out, her whole mouth trembling as Steve's eyes go impossibly wide. 

"And they have two children. Twins, a boy and a girl. The girl of whom..." **WANDA** , "is sitting about ten feet away from you."

"I...what?" trips out of Steve's mouth.

"It's very simple, you see. When it comes to Wanda Maximoff, aka the Scarlet Witch, Steve Rogers, you _are_ the...what was it... second cousin. Twice removed."

"Holy shit," Clint provides, after the whole room goes dead silent.

"How the hell did you--" Steve starts. 

"When I asked Friday to help me find something to give you, she suggested I ask a relative. When I said there were no relatives to ask, she asked me to explain the DNA match between you two." Tony gestures to Steve and Wanda. "Obviously it [wasn't much](http://forums.familytreedna.com/showthread.php?36648), but it was slightly more than what you'd get when you consider we're technically all related if you go back a few thousand years, so, it piqued my interest. So I reached out to the family of your not-so-hetero lifemate," he nods at Bucky, "to see if they had _anything_ left of yours that might have gone overlooked. And Buck Rogers, your great-niece wins the prize, because she thought to look into _Rebecca's_ things that they still have stashed in the attic. Now from what I could gather, Edita must've either a - known enough English, or b - knew someone who did, because she wrote sometime after the war, looking for Steve. And that letter must've got forwarded to the Barnes somehow."

"Yeah, yeah, it would have, I set that up," Steve stammers dazedly. "With the, I asked the people who moved into the old apartment, to send anything for me to your place." His hand lands blindly on Bucky's leg, as he's still staring at Tony. "Just in case someone...if they wrote to the old address."

"And I guess she and Barnes the Younger became penpals, because there were a couple more letters from her that Rebecca saved over the years, including," Tony rounds on Wanda, "the birth announcement for Erik Maximoff, which, obviously, matched the name Strucker had on file for your father. So. The puzzle pieces came together. I, uh, I have those letters here," Tony kneels down, putting his hands on the box he had brought from the trees to the circle. "If you want to read them. Either of you. Any of you," he tacks on, thinking that Bucky might also like to be privy to that part of his sister's life.

"I want to," Steve says, barely above a whisper.

"Me too," Wanda says thickly.

"Ha. Like distant cousin, like...other distant cousin."

Steve barks out a laugh, before his face disappears in his hands. Bucky and Peggy are clinging to him on either side, Peggy openly crying, Bucky nearly there as well. Clint reaches over, grabbing at and then pulling on Wanda's arm, and she dazedly follows his direction to get up and go to Steve. Bucky moves back to let Wanda take his spot, though he keeps his hand on Steve's back, and after a moment of Steve not moving Wanda wraps her arms around his shoulders and puts her forehead against his temple.

"I'm sorry I used to call you a fascist," she mumbles, pulling back to wipe at her eyes. "Well, I was sorry before, but I am _especially_ sorry now."

" _I'm_ sorry we joked about you hooking up with Wanda earlier, ew," Natasha murmurs, and that at last pulls a laugh out of Steve. He looks up, his face red and his eyes glistening as he squints at Wanda's face.

"I see it, a bit. You look a little like her, like my grandmother. In the eyes. It's your..." His hand drifts up, pressing against her face for a moment. "It's the cheekbones, I think." He brings his hand back to run over his own face, which only seems to make it go redder.

"Dammit Tony," Clint mutters a little wetly a few seconds later. "Makin' everyone...frickin'... _cry_..."

"Hey, it wouldn't be the holidays if someone didn't end up in tears," Tony says, and indeed now Pepper is crying, as is Laura. "At least these are happy tears. I hope."

" _Yes_ ," Wanda says, with an emphatic nod.

"Cap?" Tony's voice is uncharacteristically small.

"Yeah," Steve breathes hoarsely; he has Wanda's hands in a vice grip. "Yeah, Tony. I'm...I'm, I just... _shit_."

"Language."

Clint balls up a stray piece of wrapping paper and pegs Tony with it, and that seems to break the spell for everyone but Steve. Pepper slides out of her chair, wiping her eyes and stating the need to start clearing up; Bruce clambers to his feet to help, and soon most of everyone else is gathering up the debris, starting their own conversations, letting the newfound family process. Steve hears Bucky say something about needing to call Kim, to thank her for finding the letters; Peggy chimes in with something that sounds like vehement agreement, but for once he's too focused on another woman to pay attention to her.

"I didn't know anything," Wanda is saying, shaking her head. "I didn't...my grandmother died when I was young; I had no idea, about any of this. My parents never said anything, if they knew."

"I don't think they did; I noticed I'm not exactly popular over in Sokovia," Steve mumbles, and Wanda gives a wry laugh before she pulls him into an apologetic hug, its fierceness he returns and intensifies.

"Did you know her?" Wanda mumbles. "At all?"

"No, I...I don't remember if Edita and I ever wrote directly to each other, I don't think we did. But we knew about each other, definitely, and I'm...obviously, I'm thrilled that she made it out, I thought that no one..." He swallows, inhaling through his mouth; Wanda's face crumples up, and the back of his shoulder grows a little damp from the saltwater running down her cheeks.

"I think this calls for a cup of tea," Peggy says, and Bucky snorts at her predictability.

"I will gladly take you up on that," Wanda manages to giggle her way through, pulling back. She turns, calling the box to her with her powers, and she clasps it to her chest once it's in hand. She struggles to stand with it, and Steve helps her up, Peggy and Bucky rising with them.

Wanda is squeezed between Peggy and Steve as they drift back towards the table, and they help her into a chair. The dishes have been mostly cleared away by now, including the cups and tea kettle that had been present at dinner, and Peggy announces her intention to go into the kitchen and produce replacements.

"I'll do it," Steve says in a rush, putting his hands up to stop her. "I gotta...I need to talk to Tony anyway; I didn't..."

Peggy and Bucky wave him off before he needs to finish his thought. He hesitates a moment, watching Wanda; Bucky puts a hand on her head, lightly petting her hair, and Wanda gives Steve a watery smile, shooing him away with the hand that isn't clutching the box of letters to her chest.

A good handful of the other Avengers are milling about the table; the other half in the kitchen, set to various tasks. All of them suppose Steve is there to speak to Tony, and they elect not to distract him; indeed, they seem to covertly make themselves scarce as he passes them, heading towards one of the stoves.

Tony is not there, but the tea kettle is, and Steve moves, trance-like, filling it up and returning it to the burner in silence. He's dimly aware of people moving behind him, whispering, heading for the door leading out to the ballroom, but he's not present enough to do something about it, or think about doing something about it, really. He doesn't quite realize that he's been standing there, staring at the flames, for at least a few minutes, until he feels a pair of arms slide around his waist, turning him away from the stove so another set of hands can come up to touch his face.

"Darling? What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Steve says; he reaches up, clutching at Peggy's hands. "Nothing, I was just...I was just thinking."

"About what?" Peggy prompts, craning up to plant a kiss on his forehead.

"Just..." Steve tries to shrug, but can't with Bucky's chin resting on his shoulder. "I..." He swallows down the ache that started in his chest, with Ella, and has been progressively bubbling up into his throat since then. "We're just...we're missing a lot of people, tonight. All of us are. You and Bucky and..."

"Oh, _Steve_..." Peggy's hands slide up his face and into his air, clutching at whatever she can wrap her fingers around. "Darling, no, please don't, don't think about that. I still have Sharon. And Bucky, Bucky's got Rebecca's family; they're getting there, they're coming 'round."

"I texted Kim," Bucky murmurs into Steve's shoulder blade. "She's happy for you. Happy to've helped."

"And Wanda...Wanda is _ours_ now, too," Peggy says. "That's how it works. What's yours is ours. Right?"

"Right," Bucky answers, tightening his grip around Steve's stomach, and Steve nods, mutely.

"And we...you know, we, we have what we have, when we have it," Peggy says, echoing what Natasha had said to her back in May, shortly after Michael died and Peggy shut herself up in one of the gyms, destroying punching bag after punching bag until her feet slipped out from under her and she wound up on the floor, sobbing into one of the mats. "You just...you enjoy it while it's here. So you won't have any regrets."

"Yeah," Steve says, a puff of air. Bucky presses closer into his back, nuzzling the side of his neck. Steve feels him breathe deeply, evenly; muscle memory from decades ago when Bucky would try to help him get through asthma or panic attacks, and he brings one of his hands down, to settle atop Bucky's wrists, while the other wraps around the back of Peggy's head, pressing it close to his collar bone. "Yeah. I know. I just...needed a second."

"Hey. You three. What did I say about canoodling?"

Tony's voice is its usual brand of deliberately obnoxious, but the fact that Bucky and Peggy only look up in response, not moving to defend or banter, tells Steve that Tony had been the one to report his odd demeanor to them. He wriggles, gently extricating himself from his partners in the process, and breathes in, steeling himself as he takes a step forward, towards Tony.

"Everything okay there, Cap?"

Steve opens his mouth, and for a few seconds nothing comes out. A few thoughts pass through his head, all of them vying for the position of the next thing he'll say despite knowing that they are thoroughly, laughably inadequate.

"Dementia's not kicking in, is it?" Tony asks, shifting his weight between one foot and the other, and Steve can see it in his eyes, the dawning fear that he may have fucked up royally.

"Sofia is lucky to have you for a father," Steve says as though Tony hadn't spoken; the way he would say "the earth is round" or "my name is Steve" or any other inarguable truth, and the shit-eating look Tony had plastered onto his face slides off. "And if, if she turns out to be _anything_ like you, then...then we'll all be better off for it."

Tony stares at him for a long moment, mouth slightly agape, before his hand drifts up to his face, his thumb and forefinger pressing hard into the corner of his eyes.

"I'm too goddamn sober for that, Cap."

Steve snorts, and then laughs; Tony plants a hand on his chest and shoves, catching him slightly off-guard and making him stumble back, into Peggy and Bucky's somewhat waiting arms. Tony turns on his heel, striding away from them as he replaces his fingers with the heel of his palm.

The kettle starts to whistle, high and piercing. Peggy immediately turns to shut off the burner and pick up the kettle by the handle; Bucky goes for the cups; Steve for the teabags. They meet in the middle of the kitchen holding their own small burdens, regarding each other with watery smiles and shining eyes, and then they follow Tony's footsteps out the door, towards family, towards miracles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had a cat named Tasha once. "Tish-Tash" was one of her nicknames. 
> 
> I headcanon Clint's farm as being in Illinois because of [this](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=nKcd6MWCcew) song. On a glummer note, I also headcanon Natasha as having once attempted suicide by drowning, because of [this](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Y86wMUa3bQ8) song. 
> 
> Fun fact: Mercury is also the ruling planet of Gemini, the Twins. I bet you the Maximoffs were born sometime between mid-May and mid-June...
> 
> Like the link says, the hamsa is not as much a thing in Eastern Europe as it is in the Middle East, hence why Wanda got one from Israel. Here in America though, at least in my experience, the distinction isn't really made and they're treated as a uniformly Jewish symbol, so I would expect Tony to be familiar with them.
> 
> If I recall AoU correctly, and if Zemo's fluency is anything to go by, they appear to speak English in Sokovia at least as a second language, so I didn't think it would be too much of a stretch for Edita to find someone to help her write in English, if she didn't already know enough of the language to write simple/short correspondence. 
> 
> Thank you to the...*counts*...seven people who enjoyed this poorly-planned self-indulgent #deletelater trash mess with too many links that was written mostly while exhausted, working, or slightly tipsy 8D Speaking of links, if you didn't click the [Doxology](https://www.instagram.com/p/BOXMsRjBmWh/?taken-by=sweet.honey.sempai) one but you have a burning desire to hear what my singing voice sounds like, click it. 
> 
> Good Yuletide, Happy Hanukkah, Merry Christmas, Blessed New Year to all, and to all a good night.
> 
> PS Syria is literally going to hell so maybe shoot [Direct Relief](https://www.directrelief.org/) some monetary support if you can afford it? They're [extremely reputable](https://www.charitynavigator.org/index.cfm?bay=search.summary&orgid=3626).


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